Memories of You
by OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy
Summary: Usami Akihiko wakes up in the hospital with severe head trauma. One of the effects of this head trauma, however, is that he's forgotten some of his memories - many of them involving his lover Takahashi Misaki who, strangely, is nowhere to be found. Will Akihiko be able to find his lost memories as well as his lost lover?
1. Prologue: Prologue

**Prologue**

The pain and darkness was suffocating.

Usami Akihiko had never experienced such an excruciating pain in his life - except for the time he had broken his ankle as a child in his old home in London.

But that pain was nothing compared to this.

Every muscle in his body was screaming, and his tendons felt as if they were slowly fraying piece by piece. He couldn't see anything - and any attempt to move even the slightest caused his head to throb unmercilessly. Invisible hands crushed his lungs making each drawn breath more ragged and difficult than the last.

In silent agony, the author desperately tried to maintain his train of thought.

_Something…_he thought.

_What was I doing...Something important, I really should be...doing…_

Another painful throb jolted his brain, causing him to fall back into the drifting darkness.

Before he succumbed and fell unconscious, he faintly remembered the feeling of fabric brush his fingertips.

* * *

_**For Allison, who puts up with my stupid shit and whom I began my unhealthy obsession of BL with.**_

_**Hope you enjoy, buddy.**_

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


	2. Chapter 1: Dread

**Chapter One: Dread**

When Akihiko resurfaced, the pain had subsided faintly.

His once screaming muscles now felt as if the burned, and his head felt fuzzy. His eyelids felt as if they had sealed shut, though he was too exhausted to open them anyways.

_What happened? _he struggled to think.

Cautiously, he inhaled a few shallow breaths and attempted to calm his racing heart. He couldn't panic - Usami Akihiko was always calm, cool and collected.

He tried to focus his hearing on any noise he could hear. Pausing, he heard busy footsteps, the faraway sound of chit chat and even something similar sounding to a television, until the familiar pain began to spread throughout his skull.

He exhaled deeply, feeling drowsy once again.

_I could really use a smoke right about now. _he thought bitterly, before finally drifting off.

* * *

Aikawa Eri stiffened at the slight movement coming from her number one author's bed. She held her breath as his eyelids twitched slightly, and sighed as he went still once more.

Leaning back into the cushioned hospital chair, Aikawa groaned and stretched. Akihiko had been stone still for the past three days as she guarded him like a hawk.

"Boy, the things I do for you…" eyes traveling up and down her author once more, Aikawa stopped mid sentence as tears threatened to come again.

Her Usami-sensei looked truly terrible.

His legs were both plaster casted and elevated, and bruises and blotches covered his pale white arm from constant IV injections. Bandages covered his torso, hidden from view by the cheap hospital gown he was wearing. The worse part, Aikawa cringed thinking, was his head.

Thick gauze wrapped around his head multiple times, practically holding his skull together. A deep gash ran from the edge of his hairline to his right eyebrow. Various scrapes and bruises covered his cheeks and his eyes were sunken. The bits of his silver hair sticking out from under the gauze looked colorless and dull.

The once great and powerful Usami now looked feeble and damaged beyond repair.

Aikawa shivered at the thought.

Shaking her head as if to shake out her thoughts, she once again took a hold of the author's right hand. She gently turned it over and over in her own, brushing her thumb lightly over the scabbed knuckles and traced the spider-like veins that stood out through his paper white skin.

Her hands stilled, and tears began to fall on his hand, wet trails running off and falling to the floor as she cried.

Her biggest fear when Akihiko had arrived at the hospital was that he would die.

Her relief upon receiving news from the doctor that he would live had quickly been replaced by fear.

Because now, her biggest fear was when he would wake up.

"How am I going to tell him?! How am I going to tell him that-" she gasped and choked on the new sobs rising in her throat.

If she couldn't even bring herself to say the words while she was alone, how would she ever be able to say them when she woke up?

Aikawa was terrified.

And, as the sun began to set outside the hospital room windows, amongst all the hustle and bustle of nurses, doctors and patients, her quiet sobs could be heard until like her author next to her, she fell asleep - holding his hand.

* * *

**Wahhhh hello hello hello! Is someone actually reading this?! I'm flattered...v/v**

**I hope you enjoyed it, this is my first time publishing fanfiction, so please go easy on me ^^"**

**I actually decided to publish this story in hopes I'd actually be motivated to continue writing it.**

**Even though this is just the first chapter (and the quick little prologue is uploaded, as well) I hope you stick around! I have a lot of ideas for this story, I really hope that I can sort them all out as I go along…**

**Also, I'm really bad at thinking up titles for things...sorry in advance…x.x**

**Anyways, if you're reading this, thank you so much for reading! It means a lot...maybe drop a review, eh? ehhhh? :3**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


	3. Chapter 2: Awakening

**Chapter Two: Awakening**

When Akihiko resurfaced for the second time, he felt much more awake than before and unbearably restless.

He felt an unknown weight pressing down on his stomach, and found while his head seemed unbearably heavy, his legs didn't seem to want to move.

_Damn it all._

Sighing, he decided to open his eyes. He slowly lifted his heavy lids, only to be blinded by a bright light. He instinctively moved his right hand to shield his eyes, and heard a sudden squeak beside him.

A woman had been holding his hand.

More than that, it seemed the second she realized he was awake, she burst into tears and gave him a nearly back breaking hug.

"USAMI-SENSI!"

_WHACKJOB!?_

Akihiko was pretty sure he had no idea who this crazy woman was, even as she clung to him and got the front of his gown moist with her tears as she babbled nonsense. He awkwardly patted the top of her head with his left hand as his eyes readjusted to the new light, trying to rack his scrambled brains as to who she was.

When she finally pulled away from him, he got a better look at her. Her bright green eyes were filled with relief, and her slightly greasy strawberry blonde hair was neatly tied back into a bun, small pieces of her bangs escaping from their bobby pins. She was wearing what seemed to be a formal gray suit, and when he looked at her slightly familiar face again he noticed her smudged makeup and the imprint of his scratchy hospital sheets lightly indented on her left cheek.

To him, it looked like she had been here for quite some time, possibly even sleeping overnight at his bedside while holding his hand.

He must be important to her, but if that was true, why couldn't he remember even her name?

A sudden idea struck his mind, making him panic before he spoke.

"You're not...my wife, are you…?" he asked cautiously.

Her eyes bugged out of her head before she nearly doubled over in laughter.

_This chick just keeps getting weirder and weirder _he thought.

"No..no.." she gasped for breath as she wiped tears from her eyes, still giggling. "Really...Usami Akihiko? _My _Usami-sensei? _Straight!? _Ha! That'd be a clear sign that it was the end of the world for sure."

Akihiko's jaw hung open at her words.

_Is she calling me gay!? _

_Is it really THAT hard to believe that I could be straight..._a slight tick formed in his jaw.

"Well then, if you're not my wife, then who _are _you?" he said grumpily, crossing his arms across his chest.

She gave him a confused look.

_He doesn't know who I am? Maybe the anesthesia just hasn't worn off yet..._she thought.

Shrugging, she stepped aside and smoothed the front of her pants and pushed most of her bangs behind her ear, before giving him a deep bow.

"I am Aikawa Eri, your editor and close friend. We've worked together many years, and together we've produced many best selling books and BL mangas over the years," she stood back up straight and gave him a thumbs up. "Basically, you use that genius head of yours to crank out good stories and I fix 'em up. Simple, right?"

"Though," she placed her hands under her chin and looked dreamily off into the distance. "I really do love working with you when we need to produce the next volume of one of your BL series - my heart starts racing just thinking about it! Where will the characters go next? Will the tsundere uke finally admit his feelings!? Will they think of some new position!? Or, will a rival seme come into the picture, potentially threatening the state of the couple's relationship and bring out the main seme's fiercer side that's never been revealed before!? " the last thought made her squeal and blush with delight.

Meanwhile, the banged up and bruised Akihiko seemed stupified at Aikawa's words, still frozen in shock as she took his hands again and began babbling to him about the newest creation he had come up with - though still numb to her words, the only thing he managed to catch was "sexy time on a ferris wheel".

"Okay okay, I get it." he sighed, lightly pushing his fangirling editor away.

He closed his eyes and massaged his forehead, trying to rid himself of the almost certain migraine he would have later. Finally adjusted and feeling fully awake, he was suddenly aware of just how achy he felt. When he opened his eyes again, they widened suddenly at the sight of his casted legs.

Aikawa froze and fell silent as she saw her author begin to process his condition.

Akihiko couldn't feel his legs.

Panic welled in his chest as he removed the blanket from himself, revealing his bandaged torso.

_What the-_

Suddenly stiffening, he slowly lifted his hands to feel his head. The rough gauze scraped against his fingertips and he hissed quietly in pain when he applied pressure to areas on his skull, his heart rate quickening when he realized just how badly injured he was.

He met Aikawa's eyes with a slightly panicked gaze.

"_What happened?"_

* * *

**HOLY CRUD. **

**A BUNCH of people reviewed/followed/favorited this story after I posted the last chapter and said such nice things! (Except YOU, Allison. Be happy, this story is mostly dedicated to you, after all c:)**

**It really made me happy! Though, I'm usually pretty shy so I really wasn't even expecting anyone to even consider reading this...but I'm so glad! Now I really have a motivation to write!**

**Though now...I'm kind of nervous 0_0 (Can you tell? I got nervous since this'll probably be an angsty story so I attempted to put some humor in it...am I funny yet)**

***sweats* I better not screw this up…**

**Crap...I feel like I should make these chapters longer, too...ah, well, I'm hopefully going to upload more today anyways...I actually got most of my school work done early today so I could write the rest of the day...fanfiction DOES make you more productive!**

**I hope you're all having a super kick-ass and productive day!**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy 3**


	4. Chapter 3: What Happened?

**Chapter 3: What Happened?**

All of the previous effects of fangirling had left Aikawa's system completely.

This time, like many countless times before, she had tried to avoid her problems by indulging herself in things she enjoyed or loved - and like every other time, without fail, reality had come crashing back down on her.

Now her author was staring at her as the question she dreaded most hung in the air.

_What happened?_

Her eyes wandered around the room and her anxiety began to spike as she felt his heavy and questioning gaze weighing on her. She looked at anything - the floor, the IV drip, the television she had muted and left on - but those violet irises still pierced her, the power they held was suffocating.

She slowly looked up to meet his gaze.

"Well?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

_Of course, only you would..._

She shook her head at her author who even now, despite all of his injuries, seemed to be brimming with confidence and power just when he needed it.

She took a deep and shaky breath, and exhaled deeply - her mind racing.

There was no telling how much he remembered, if he didn't even remember her.

Clenching her fists, she knew she'd have to choose her next words carefully.

* * *

_Come on already, spit it out!_

Usami Akihiko was growing more and more impatient as the seconds ticked by.

Hell, if he was plaster casted, beat up and couldn't even remember his own occupation, then he damn well deserved to know what had caused it.

_So why aren't you telling me? _he thought irritably.

His annoyance grew as he noticed her look around in an attempt to stall his question. He wasn't asking for much - all he wanted was an answer, so why was it so damn difficult?

"_That's the way people are, Akihiko."_

Akihiko stiffened slightly, faintly remembering a voice in the back of his head - words that he remembered being told to him long ago.

"_Nothing in this world is free, and people are not so willing to give up the things they have - whether it be a possession, information or merely kindness."_

"_So you know how the strong survive?"_

"_You __**take **__that which is yours."_

"_You instill __**fear **__into others. Even if it is fake, no, even if everything you say is a lie, show them, 'I am better than you. I was __**always**_ _better than you. Compared to me, you are __**nothing **__and that is why I will take what I want'"_

"_Understand?"_

_Yes, father..._he remembered himself saying.

"_Ha! Good boy! You sure are a quick learner. Now, about getting you a tutor…"_

Akihiko quickly snapped out of his sudden flashback.

He realized, if he wanted to get information out of her, he would have to show her that he wasn't going to put up with her stalling anymore.

_Instill fear…_

He crossed his arms and stared straight at her, putting all of his thoughts - all of his will - into the gesture.

He felt himself radiate power. Focusing on it, that power began to swell.

Aikawa twitched, as if she was able to sense his menacing aura, and slowly met his gaze. Her face looked conflicted, as if she didn't want to be caught in some sort of act, but wanted to confess everything all at once.

_Weirdo._

"Well?" he cocked an eyebrow as one final touch.

At this gesture, Aikawa finally seemed to make up her mind, and sighed.

Clenching her fists, she turned to face him.

* * *

"You...were in an accident…" she began. "Well...it, it wasn't really your fault, but...as you were driving, another car hit yours. Well, it wouldn't have been so bad but you know, red sports cars aren't the _safest _vehicles…"

She paused to see if he recalled any of what she was saying.

By the looks of his blank expression, he didn't seem to be.

_Good._ she thought as she continued her story.

* * *

_Ah, so it was a car accident then _Akihiko thought as he listened intently to her story.

"Anyways, it was pouring that night anyways, since a typhoon was scheduled to come through Tokyo that day."

"But, like _always_, we were late with the manuscript - I couldn't hold off the printers anymore, meaning _you _couldn't hold _me _off anymore. You had to get it done that day, storm or not, or else our reputations would've been at stake. And, of course with our luck, your laptop died. So you had to write the rest of the 100,000 words of the manuscript by hand…"

Her lip began to quiver.

"I...I'm sorry, it's all my fault! You ran out of paper and I was away and couldn't bring you any, so...so when you called I made you go out and drive in the rain…"

She sat down heavily in the chair next to the bed and shielded her eyes from him, averting them to the floor.

A few seconds ticked by as she got the rest of her thoughts in order before she continued with her story.

"Well, what the police told me happened after was that someone who was driving the other way on the road lost control of their car - the rain was so heavy and it was so late at night, you must not have seen them coming and didn't know to swerve or slow down...so they hit you head on."

"The outcome wouldn't have been as bad as it is, but the airbags in your car were defective. You...you weren't wearing your seatbelt at the time either, and ended up getting ejected from the car itself and hit your head pretty hard on the pavement Your legs had gotten twisted up badly in the wreckage, too."

She paused again to clear her throat.

"When I first got a call you had been in an accident, they...they weren't sure if you were going to live. I was scared that...that I had lost you forever. I was so scared...but after your surgery, they said that you were going to be alright, and that I just had to wait until you woke up, so here I've been-"

She gestured her arm to their surroundings.

"I've been here, waiting for four days. Four days, so that I can say it personally," she put her fists in her lap and bowed as deeply as her body would allow while sitting.

"I am so, so sorry. Please forgive me. Please, for all this, forgive me."

Aikawa really looked like she was about to cry as her shoulders shook and she hung her head in shame.

They sat together in silence again as Akihiko let her words sink in.

_She blames herself... _he thought, his eyes softening and his irritation dulling at her honesty.

He exhaled deeply, looking again at his casted legs and damaged body then again to his editor. He twitched as he felt a twinge of guilt - he couldn't let her blame it all on herself.

"Look, Eri…" the woman flinched at the sound of her first name before finally raising her head to once again look him in the eyes.

"This isn't all your fault, okay? Things happen for a reason after all, whether they seem good at the time or horrendous, we can't change them, so stop worrying, okay? Look,"

He placed his hand on his chest.

"I'm alive, aren't I? And awake? Isn't that the most important thing right now?"

She hiccupped as her eyes began to water at his words.

"What I mean is - I forgive you. Of course I forgive you."

He gave her a reassuring smile and held out his hand to her. She looked at him cautiously, before taking his hand again and squeezing it tightly.

She let out a shaky sigh.

"Thank you."

He pat her shoulder and gave it a squeeze. He waited for her to calm down before speaking again.

"Now, now that I know what happened, can I ask you a few more things…?"

She nodded.

"Anything."

* * *

They had talked for hours, and Aikawa told Akihiko everything she had been told about his condition and that of the owner of the other car.

She said that they had been transported to another hospital and had their car separately towed before an ambulance had arrived for Akihiko, so she had no idea of their condition - or even their name. What she had known, however, is that it had to have been an equally expensive if not more expensive car as her Usami-sensei's.

They didn't live in the common man's section of Tokyo, after all.

"_Those rich bastards,"_ she had muttered.

"_They probably hauled ass once they realized they'd hit someone else with as much cash as them. They probably didn't want to risk soiling their reputation and tried to run before they got spotted."_

regarding Akihiko, however, the doctor had told her that they weren't exactly sure how bad his head injury would ultimately be.

When he had fallen, the impact of his head to the concrete had damaged certain parts of his cerebrum in his brain - which contain memory and the ability to process thought.

They honestly had no idea how this would end up affecting him or what memories or skills could be harmed, and wouldn't be able to tell until his anesthesia had worn off.

When Aikawa told him this, Akihiko had realized for the first time that he had never really stopped to think about it, and when she excused herself to go get him something to drink and to stretch her legs, his mind quickly couldn't _stop_ thinking about it.

_Who am I? How old am I? _he began thinking.

_Do I have family? Why wouldn't they be here, then… _he found himself feeling strangely irritated at the thought, though he didn't know why.

_Ah, well, I guess I probably don't like them then._

He brushed the backside of his hand against his cheek and leaned back into his pillows. He thought of what Aikawa had said about him before when she had laughed when he had mistaken her for his wife.

_If she's not my wife...then am I in love with someone else?_

His heart began to flutter at the sudden thought and a smile instantly tugged at his lips.

_Yes._

He balled his sheets into one of his fists over his heart. He knew for a fact that there was someone he loved - he could feel it in his gut (since he didn't quite have his brains at the moment).

_But do they love me back?_

He paused, but the feeling in his chest did not go away.

_Thank goodness. _

So he was in love with someone who loved him back. He frowned, though, when he also realized that they - like his family - also weren't at his bedside waiting for him to wake up.

The feeling in his chest suddenly felt hollow, and his anxiety began to creep up on him once more as he wondered where they were.

Would they still love him? Would they still love him even if he had lost his memory? Even if he had forgotten them? Would they even want someone as banged up as he was?

_But, right now..._he thought.

_Wherever you are…_

_I can't even remember your name._

Akihiko felt frustrated and ashamed, and tried desperately to remember anything about them at all.

He couldn't even begin to place their face, let alone their name.

Grumbling in frustration, he slammed his fist down next to him, the impact silenced by the soft mattress, and waited for what seemed like forever until Aikawa returned.

He would have many new questions to ask her when she got back.

* * *

**Hello everybody! :D **

**I'm so sorry...this was supposed to be up yesterday, but…**

***sigh* I shouldn't make promises.**

**Anyway, yay! Now you know how Usagi got all banged up and bruised.**

**Damn rich people…**

**(Just kidding, in case you're rich...please don't sue me)**

**I managed to make this chapter longer, but sadly I might have to wait until thursday to update again...I sort of put off my newspaper deadline and I'll have to crank out a story by tomorrow x.x **

**And I have a huge pre-test tomorrow, too...I have a feeling it's going to be a stressful day :S**

**Oh, well, I hope you all are doing well! **

**(MEET YOUR DEADLINES IF YOU HAVE ANY!)**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy ~(=u=~ )**


	5. Chapter 4: Secrets

**Chapter 4: Secrets**

When Aikawa had finally returned, she noticed almost immediately that there had been a change in her author between the time she had left and the time she had returned.

Before, he had seemed relaxed. Now he seemed on edge and restless, awkwardly shifting back and forth as much as his elevated legs would allow.

She knew just by looking at him that he had something he wanted to ask.

"Alright, what is it?" she asked, sitting down again in the chair beside him as she handed him a bottle of water.

Akihiko gave the slightest of pouts as he took it.

"Am I that obvious?" he asked.

"No, not really. But when you've been around someone as long as I have you, you begin notice the little things." she said, poking his forehead.

He glared at her slightly over the water bottle as he took a sip.

"So, what is it?" she asked again, leaning her face into her hand.

Akihiko stayed silent as he tried to sort his raging thoughts and countless questions. He continued to take sips and let the cool water sooth his parched throat. He swallowed slowly before answering.

"Aikawa...is...is there someone that I'm in love with, currently?" he asked quietly.

"Yes." she said bluntly.

He blinked.

_Well, that was a quick answer…_

"Can you tell me what they're like? How old they are? Are they…" he paused, remembering their previous conversation. "...a guy?"

She sighed, and brushed her bangs out of her eyes. She took a small sip of her own water, her mind seeming as if it were somewhere else. She rubbed her eye before looking at him again.

"Well...do you remember anything about them?" she asked.

"No…" Akihiko looked down at his folded hands and thought for a few moments, racking his brain for any memories. There were none.

"No." he said more confidently, before looking her in the eyes.

"Please, tell me everything about them."

* * *

_Not good, not good!_

Aikawa was practically screaming the same two words over and over in her head.

She kept her emotions and panic in check as her author awaited her answer.

_This is seriously bad. _she thought.

If Akihiko didn't remember who Misaki was, then he definitely didn't remember any of the recent events that had happened between the couple and Misaki's brother, Takahiro.

* * *

Just a few months before the accident, and after being together for four years, Misaki had finally worked up the courage to tell his brother that Akihiko and he were in an intimate relationship and that they planned on staying together for the rest of their lives. With the support of his Usagi-san (Akihiko), they had talked Takahiro into coming over to talk to them, telling him that it was urgent.

The meeting had started off bad, since Misaki and Akihiko didn't plan on Takahiro bringing his wife, Manami, and their child Mahiro. Aikawa had been present, too, so in an attempt to help get the three men alone she had invited Manami and Mahiro into the kitchen with her to help prepare tea.

When the three were alone, Misaki and Akihiko had Takahiro sit down, and sat on the couch across from him as they carefully explained their predicament, all the while holding each others hands. The couple had hoped he would understand, but sadly, all of their hope had been smashed to pieces as Takahiro's face had gone pale as the minutes had ticked by.

Aikawa didn't know exactly what or how much they had told them, but she did remember hearing him start shouting at them horrible things. She, along with Manami holding Mahiro in her arms, had run back out into the living room to see what the commotion was (though, Aikawa had a pretty good idea).

When they had entered, Takahiro was absolutely furious - much more furious than they would have expected of the usually calm and kind man. He was red in the face, screaming at Akihiko and calling him terrible things - things Aikawa wished she could've forgotten - and had been trying to pull the now crying Misaki away from him.

"Nii-chan! Please, let me go!"Misaki had pleaded, desperatley trying to stay by Akihiko as his brother still pulled him away.

"Please! I'm still the same! I'm still your brother!"

"No you're not!" he had practically roared, tugging harshly on the sibling he had always been so gentle with.

"Something is definitely _wrong_ with you, and it's all _his_ fault!" he spat savagely at Akihiko who, for once, was at a loss for words.

"Please, Takahiro, if you would just listen to me-"

"Don't you _**dare **_touch me!" he had growled when Akihiko had attempted to remove his grasp on Misaki's arm.

Akihiko actually recoiled in fear at the savage response.

"Takahiro, dear-" Manami began, trying to sooth her husband's rage as Mahiro fidgeted in her arms. "Please stop yelling, you're upsetting Mahiro-kun-"

"Do you think I _care _right now, Manami? My best friend has been fucking my brother right under my nose and I wasn't told about it until now!" he screamed, his rage turning on his wife making her cower in fear. Mahiro began to cry.

Aikawa was about to interject, when suddenly the loud _crack _sound of a slap silenced the commotion.

"Nii-chan. That's enough."

Misaki's hand was still raised, putting all of his courage into his words. His brother's face was shocked at the impact the slap in the face had given him - the slightest amount of hurt filled his eyes.

Misaki's knees trembled, while the tension in the room could be cut with a knife as everyone awaited his response to Misaki's actions.

Finally, he regained his composure and his expression turned cold as he let go of his brother. Misaki quickly scrambled back into Akihiko's arms in fear that Takahiro would try to drag him away again.

"Let's go, Manami." Takahiro said, turning towards the door, his voice as cold as ice. His wife, afraid of this new terrifying side of her husband, quickly joined his side as they began to leave. Mahiro, still in her arms, reached over her shoulder at Misaki and Akihiko.

"Mi-chan! Unagi!" the toddler cried.

"Takahiro, wait! We can talk about this, I'm your friend-"

"Friend…?" Takahiro said quietly, pausing as he opened the front door. He looked back at Akihiko over his shoulder.

"I have no friend. And right now as far as I'm concerned, I have no brother."

Akihiko had frozen at these words, agony and sadness rippling across his face at his once best friend's cruel words. As soon as Takahiro and his family had left, both Misaki and Akihiko had collapsed.

Aikawa had quickly ran to their sides to provide the best comfort she could, though it had never been her specialty. She hugged Misaki, who sobbed violently into her shoulder as Akihiko remained much more quiet, silently beating himself up in his head as he stared blankly at the door.

When Misaki had pulled away from her, he rubbed his puffy eyes and wiped his snotty nose on his sleeve, not caring anymore about appearances. He looked up at Akihiko, his emerald green eyes filled with sadness before he crashed into the large man's chest.

"It's not fair!" he said into his chest as Akihiko hugged him, his eyes still vacant of any emotion as he tried to repress them, so not to upset Misaki more.

"It's not fair, Usagi-san! Why, why if...if I would've gotten a _girlfriend _while at M University and said I wanted to marry her, he would've been ecstatic! But just because you're not a girl, and we're not just friends, why...why does he have to get so angry!" he looked up at him, new tears staining his face.

"Why is it, now he hates us? Just because I...I…" both Akihiko and Akihiko's eyes began to widen as Misaki spoke.

"Because I love you?"

In the four years of them being together, Misaki had never once had the courage to boldly state that he loved Akihiko with as much confidence as he did in that moment. Aikawa began to tear up, and Akihiko, no longer able to hold back, crushed Misaki into a hug.

And, for only the second time in his life, the first time being when he had fallen in love with Misaki, did Usami Akihiko allow himself to cry in the presence of others.

* * *

Aikawa really didn't want to have to tell her author about how the times had been for them after that. Both of them had been depressed and upset. Aikawa had even attempted to call Takahiro herself as a neutral party to help out, but when she had tried the numbers for Takahiro's home phone and cell phone had been changed.

She looked at her blissfully ignorant author in front of her, looking back at her with a little bit of excitement in his eyes, eager to hear about his wonderful relationship. It made her heart clench.

How would she be able to explain it easily?

She also felt a chill go down her spine, remembering that she had also successfully lied to him before too.

Akihiko hadn't been the only one in the car.

Misaki had been in the passenger seat.

"Well?" her author asked, trying to hold back his curiosity.

"I'm waiting."

* * *

**HELLO.**

**Ugh I am a horrible person, I update 3 days late, then hit you with angst and THEN leave the chapter on a cliffhanger…**

**Please forgive me *bows deeply***

**Anyways…**

**Does anyone else notice that Takahiro is almost always a raging homophobe in fanfictions? No? Just me? Well, I hope he isn't a cannon homophobe, though, since in the newest chapter update Misaki said he wanted to tell Takahiro...now I'm nervous.**

**Well, I hope everyone reading this is doing well! Thank you all so much for following/favoriting/reviewing! ;u; It makes me really happy I wish I could hug you all…**

**(oh! and also I think I fixed the genre of the story so that it showed up under mystery. I thought I had before, but oh well...fixed it!)****

**I hope everyone is doing well! c:**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**

****EDIT:**

**OH MY GOD I'M SO STUPID. I misread the comment before, it didn't say to PUT the story under mystery, it said to REMOVE it.**

**I'm so sorry I'm so dumb. Okay, I REALLY fixed it this time so it's not under it anymore...**

**I need to stop getting so excited and misreading things...*dies of embarrassment***


	6. Chapter 5: Deals

**Chapter 5: Deals**

Usami Akihiko waited impatiently once more to hear what Aikawa had to say.

Like before, she was being hesitant, as if there was something she didn't want to tell him.

_What is it? Are we fighting right now or something? _his happiness deflated the slightest.

_Ah, well, I guess that would explain why they aren't here…_

But still, something about the way Aikawa had gone strangely quiet unsettled him.

"Erm, have I said something wrong?" he asked, causing her to jump at his words.

"No, no! Just...they're a little hard to explain, is all…" she waved off his question. "I'm just trying to...er, figure out how best to describe them…"

Her words put Akihiko at ease, and he readjusted himself as he moved his hips awkwardly and as much at his legs would allow.

Impatient and uncomfortable, all he could do was wait.

_God knows what's going on in _her _head _he thought.

* * *

Aikawa began panicking and her palms began to sweat.

_Crap, crap! _she thought.

_He has no idea what happened…_

* * *

Unbeknown to her author, she had decided not to mention the fact that Misaki had been a passenger in the car when the accident had occurred. Since Usami Akihiko had an infamous habit of ignoring deadlines and slacking off, she had practically begged Misaki to go with him when she told Akihiko to get more paper.

After the accident had occurred, Aikawa had been the one contacted for Akihiko, since he was on bad terms with his family, he had much rather she be listed under his contact information on his file. Her heart had nearly stopped at the news the couple had been in an accident, and had broken nearly every legal road law in the country of Japan as she frantically drove her way to the hospital.

She had ran to the emergency room, her hair a mess and clothes soaking wet from the heavy rains outside. When she had made it to the emergency waiting room, she was a winded, unappealing mess, only to find the reception desk unoccupied. She looked around frantically in the room for any member of staff, and nearly fainted at seeing the person she had least expected to see there-

Takahiro.

He was waiting by himself in the dimly lit area, slumped over in the uncomfortably small chairs hospitals always seemed to provide. Looking up, as soon as they had made eye contact his usually sweet expression turned sour.

He immediately looked away and shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

Without really thinking, Aikawa made her way towards him. He seemed to try to sink farther into his seat as he saw her approach.

When she stopped in front of him, however, realizing there was nowhere to run or hide, he looked at her directly in the eye.

"What." he stated, more than asked in a monotone voice.

"Why are you here?" she asked incredulously.

Takahiro scoffed at her question.

"Well, _I _got a call saying that Misaki was in an accident, so I came." he said. "I mean, even if I am mad, I'm not heartless enough to just leave my brother alone in a place like this."

"Yet you were heartless enough to abandon him before?" she asked. He glared at her.

"This is not the time nor the place to discuss this, listen-" he paused, the faint sound of footsteps could be heard. "The nurse said that she'd be back in a few minutes, I think that's her."

Sure enough, in a few moments the nurse appeared.

Aikawa gave Takahiro one last suspicious glance before going over to the reception desk to check herself in

* * *

After checking in, Aikawa sat down in the chair to Takahiro's left t wait for their names to be called.

He wrinkled his nose at her and looked down at her in intimidation. She simply ignored it; she wasn't ready to leave him alone so easily.

"So, why are _you _here," he asked. "I mean, it's not like you care about my brother or anything, so you must be here for _him, _right?"

"If by 'him' you mean Usami-sensei, then yes. Yes, that's part of why I'm here, but I'm also here for Misaki-kun as well." she said. Takahiro snorted.

"Don't be so familiar when talking about my brother. You're just here for your money making author, right?" he crossed his arms and looked away.

"If you cared about him at all, you would've let me know what was going on all those years." he muttered.

Aikawa brisled at Takahiro's words.

"First of all, Usami-sensai is _not _just a money making author. He's my friend, and I care about him as if he were my own family. And _Misaki-kun,_" she said, Takahiro twitched at the way she emphasized his name. "Misaki-kun is very, very special to me. I love him dearly, so I rushed here as soon as I got called."

Takahiro glared at her, and she glared right back with as much if not more menace than he was giving her.

"And for your information, I didn't say anything because I know, for a fact, Usami-sensei _loves _ Misaki-kun more than anything in this world. He'd never do anything to hurt him." she stated.

"But, but he touched my brother, and didn't even tell me about it. What kind of friend is he, that he couldn't even _tell _me? And more than that, why did it have to be _my _brother? Couldn't he have been in love with someone else?" He asked.

"Well...in the beginning, he did love someone else…" she whispered, looking up at him.

"You."

Takahiro's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Wha...no, no...he couldn't have! I'm sure I would've-"

"No, he did. He loved you for years," Aikawa looked back down at her hands in her lap. "But you never noticed."

Takahiro was stunned at her words. That stunned look quickly turned to denial and anger.

"Why should I listen to what you say, anyway," he spat. "You're in league with those two!"

"I guess I am." Aikawa said simply.

The two sat in silence for several minutes, Takahiro shifted in his seat uncomfortably as Aikawa remained motionless, staring at the emergency room door waiting for the doctor to come and bring them to where Akihiko and Misaki were.

After what seemed like an eternity, the door finally opened.

Aikawa's jaw dropped at the sight of the doctor who, as tall as he was, had to duck slightly to avoid hitting his head on the door frame. He had inky black hair and cobalt blue eyes, and regarded Aikawa and Takahiro with the kindest of smiles. He was undoubtedly handsome, and Aikawa recognized him immediately as the Nowaki used in one of her author's series that he had based around his childhood friend - Kamijou Hiroki's - relationship.

_He must be Kamijou-san's boyfriend _she thought.

Deciding it was best not to mention anything, she kept her mouth shut and tried to look as normal as possible as Nowaki spoke.

"Hello, my name is Kusama Nowaki. I'd take it you two are here for Usami-san and Takahashi-kun?" he asked sweetly, making her blush slightly.

"Y-yes...we are." Takahiro stuttered, obviously affected by the attractive aura of the doctor.

Aikawa snickered at the thought.

"Well, I'm here to help take care of them for now. Actually, I'm usually a pediatric surgeon, but since it's so late at night and we're so short staffed, I couldn't just refuse patients in such critical condition…" the doctor smiled at them again. "But don't worry, we're very good at what we do here, so right now they're both stable and resting comfortably."

Aikawa and Takahiro sighed in relief.

"Now, would you two like to see them yourselves?" he asked.

Both of them nodded, and practically shoved each other out of the way as they followed the doctor into the emergency room.

The three of them walked down the dimly lit hallway, passing rooms with sleeping patients, the sounds of beeping and water drips echoing throughout the building along with the sound of their footsteps.

"We'll have to take the elevator first, though, since all of the regular rooms for patients in the emergency unit are filled, they've been moved to the extra overflow rooms on the sixth floor." Nowaki said. Shortly after he said that, they all turned left, facing the elevator doors. Nowaki pressed the button to call the elevator down.

"So...hasn't this cut into your overtime hours tonight?" Takahiro asked curiously. "I mean, you probably could've let someone else take the surgery job, right?"

The elevator door opened and the trio entered.

"Yes," Nowaki said as the door closed. "I could have let my Senpai take over, but the whole reason I became a doctor was for the sake of helping others."

He looked at Takahiro as the elevator began to rise.

"I was supposed to go home about 4 hours ago, yet here I am. But, if I were to leave, knowing that there was something I could've done to help, wouldn't that be going against the very reason I went into this career in the first place?"

Takahiro blushed at the doctor's cool words.

"I...I guess you're right." he scratched his neck in embarrassment as Aikawa remained silent.

"Besides," Nowaki continued, watching the numbers light up as they moved up each level. "Takahashi-kun is so small, for a minute I thought he was a kid himself. It's not that I don't trust my peers, but I couldn't just leave him. And, Usami-san is a friend of a friend, so I'd feel _really _guilty if I left work knowing he was hurt too."

The elevator doors opened and the three of them entered the sixth floor hallway. Still embarrassed, Takahiro tried to cover up his last fail at conversation.

"I just meant...even so, you must have plans or a life outside of work, right?" he said. "I mean, I myself would never be able to sacrifice my time like that if I knew other people I trusted would be able to handle it..."

The doctor suddenly stopped in front of one of the rooms, causing Takahiro and Aikawa to nearly crash into him. He paused before he took a hold of the door handle.

From where she was standing, Aikawa could just barely see a sad, faraway look begin to creep into the sweet man's eyes as he looked down at the handle.

"I did have plans tonight…" he whispered. "I was supposed to spend time with him today…promised..."

"I'm sorry? What did you say?" Takahiro asked.

"Hm?" The doctor quickly snapped out of his own thoughts before looking over and smiling at them once more.

"Oh, it's nothing, nothing! Now," he slowly opened the door. "Why don't you spend a little time with Usami-san and Takahashi-kun? I'll be back in a bit with the paperwork."

* * *

Once Aikawa and Takahiro were inside, the doctor quickly disappeared down the hall.

As the door shut, the same tension between them had quickly been replaced in Nowaki's absence.

Yet, any chance of the two beginning to argue was quickly snuffed out at the sight of Misaki and Akihiko, both wrapped in bandages and hooked up to several machines.

Takahiro's face immediately softened as he quickly rushed to Misaki's bedside. Misaki's small chest rose and fell with each small breath he took. His eyelids fluttered faintly as he slept. His face was slightly swollen, and his chest was wrapped up, similar to Akihiko in the bed next to him whose torso was covered by the criss-crossing of bandages.

They both had bandages wrapped around their heads, but unlike Akihiko, Misaki seemed to be in much better shape. Unlike Akihiko, whose legs were both in casts and whose face was cut, Misaki had only broken his right arm and had a few bruises on his arms and face.

"Oh, Misaki-kun…" Takahiro said, taking his left hand. "You look awful, but I'm so glad you're alright." The older brother held his younger brother's hand into his own as he watched him sleep, completely oblivious to his former best friend, Akihiko, in the bed next to him.

It made Aikawa feel sick.

She silently slid behind Takahiro to look at her author. She gently brushed her hand across his cheek as her sad eyes traveled his broken body. She looked behind her over at Misaki.

She smiled sadly at the thought that, if not for Takahiro being there, she would've placed Misaki and Akihiko's hands together.

_Just like something you would write about, you hopeless romantic _she thought, looking lovingly at her friend and author.

* * *

When Nowaki had returned, he knocked quietly on the door before entering.

Both Takahiro and Aikawa looked up at him as he smiled and closed the door behind him.

"I'm sorry, I just had to pick up the official paperwork on Usami-san and Takahashi-kun's injuries." he said before flipping through the small folder he held in his hand.

"Let's see...Usami-san has breaks in multiple areas of his legs, a few burns on his abdomen and head trauma."

"Takahashi-kun, on the other hand, has a break in the humerus bone in his right arm, two broken ribs and head trauma as well."

Both Takahiro and Aikawa paled at this information.

"W-wait...if they both hit their heads, does that mean they have brain damage?!" Aikawa panicked.

"Well…" Nowaki sighed as he looked her in the eyes. "We're not completely sure on this. Though, both patients have damage in the cerebral parts of their brain, we're thinking there might be some moderate to severe memory loss for both of them."

"Wait...you're kidding, right?" Takahiro stammered as he his hand through his short brown hair. "This doesn't happen in real life, losing your memory. You've got to be kidding me."

"Actually, these cases do happen from time to time," Nowaki said. "Sometimes, the patient wakes up not knowing the year or the time, sometimes they don't remember chunks of their past, and sometimes - on luckier occasions - they don't forget anything at all. It just depends on the patients themselves."

"But, interestingly enough," Nowaki continued, walking over to the opposite side of Akihiko's bed.

"We believe Takahashi-kun has a lesser chance of memory loss. From what the medical evidence is showing, we believe Usami-san shielded him with his own body during the crash. As you can tell, Takahashi-kun has significantly less injuries than Usami-san. If he were to have shielded his body by hugging him, per se, then Usami-san must've taken most of the blows from the outside as Takahashi-kun got jostled a bit while in his grip."

"This would also make sense that somehow, they had both somehow managed to hit their heads as well, if they were in such close proximity to each other. So, if anyone is going to have the most memory loss, I'm afraid that it will probably be Usami-san." He added quietly, looking down at the silver haired author.

Aikawa let out a shaky sigh as she ran her own fingers through her hair at this new information.

_Great, now he's going to have memory loss too?! _she felt her anxiety rising at the very thought.

She took a quick glance at Takahiro, who seemed eerily emotionless and quiet.

"Ah, well, I'll give you all a little more time with the patients. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to call the number written down next to the phone and I'll be sure to answer." Nowaki gave a quick bow before exiting the room once more.

"Aikawa." Takahiro said as soon as Nowaki left.

She stood up from where she had been kneeling to hold her author's hand and looked at him.

"Yes?" she asked, looking at him with a guarded expression. Suprising her, he took both her wrists and pulled her close to him.

"HEY! WHAT'RE YOU-" she began to yell before he put a finger to her lips.

"Let's make a deal." he said cooly, sending a shiver down her spine before he released her wrists.

"What kind of 'deal' are you talking about?" she whispered, rubbing her wrists.

His eyes seemed to be filled with a sudden excitement that set Aikawa on edge. Afraid that he had finally snapped, she was about to take a few steps back before he spoke.

"I want you to make a deal with me - if my brother and Usami wake up, but they don't remember each other, than we need to _keep _it that way, understand?" he said, making Aikawa to freeze in her tracks.

_Are you crazy?! There's no way I'm agreeing to that! _she scowled at him.

"What do you take me for?" She asked, crossing her arms.

Takahiro's eyes seemed to hold a devilish glint before he spoke again.

"Oh, well, if you don't, then I guess I'll just have to tell the whole world that the famous Usami Akihiko has been sleeping with a man - but not _just _a man, but one that's ten years his junior." he said.

If she wasn't certain before, Aikawa was one hundred percent sure now that Takahiro had completely lost his mind.

"There's no chance in hell you'd do that - think about Misaki-kun, you'd be hurting him along with Usami-sensei!" she said in disbelief.

Takahiro seemed to think for a minute, realizing that what he had said was flawed. Aikawa could practically see the wheels turning in his head before he answered her again.

"Well, that's true. But, being as I was friends with Usami for such a long time, I do have my fair share of dirty secrets about him that, oh, I don't know...I could possibly let slip to some ravenous news reporter somewhere." Takahiro said, smirking at the now fuming editor in front of him.

"You wouldn't." she whispered.

"But I would." he said. "Please, Aikawa. All you have to do is help me keep them from remembering each other, and then you won't have to worry about this at all. It's simple."

_Shit. _she thought bitterly.

_I can't let Usami-sensei's reputation ruined. But, Misaki-kun...he couldn't possibly live without him! And Misaki-kun too, he loves Usami-sensei so much…_

Aikawa's frustration began to grow.

"But...why?" she asked, her fists shaking in rage. "Why would you go so far as to ruin Usami-sensei just to keep them apart? Why do you care _that_ much?"

"Why?" Takahiro asked, looking genuinely surprised.

It pissed Aikawa off.

"I thought it would be obvious." Takahiro said, gently placing his hand on top of Misaki's head.

"I just want what's best for Misaki. And I think the best thing for him would be to pretend like Usami never existed. Then, he could possibly find a nice girl, they could get married and he could start a happy, healthy, _normal _family of his own." Takahiro said, looking down lovingly at his brother.

It made Aikawa's skin crawl.

She was silent for several minutes, thinking it over and weighing her options.

She could say no; then Misaki and Akihiko could be together, but Akihiko's reputation would be ruined. Now, before the accident, Aikawa knew for a fact her Usami-sensei couldn't give two shits about his reputation as long as Misaki was left out of it.

But now…

Now she wasn't even sure if he'd remember who Misaki was.

Then that left her with the option of going along with Takahiro's plan. Akihiko's reputation would be safe, and Misaki would be fine, but only if they both didn't remember each other.

It was a huge gamble to take.

Aikawa's stomach began to ache from anxiety as Takahiro waited for her response.

"I...I," Aikawa stuttered, before finally giving into Takahiro's threat. "I guess then, you have a deal."

Takahiro's face lit up immediately as Aikawa hung her head in shame.

"I'm glad you see it my way! Now," he said excitedly, fumbling around the hospital room. "Let's see, they can't wake up in the same room together, so I'll have to request for Misaki to be moved…"

Takahiro took a hold of the corded phone and dialed the number the doctor had left on the side table next to Misaki' bed.

"Ah, hello. Yes, Dr. Kusama? I was wondering whether I could request to have Takahashi Misaki moved into a private room…"

* * *

A whole new wave of shame washed over Aikawa as she sat in front of her author now, who was wide awake and looking at her expectantly.

It was in this room she had given up his one true love for the sake of his career - a choice he should've been able to make himself.

"Well, gee...ah…what are they like..." she rambled as he took in every word she said.

_What do I do?! _she thought.

_Maybe…_

A sudden idea popped into her head.

"Well, first of all, their name is Takahashi Misaki." She said with a confidence she didn't even have a fraction of.

"Misaki…" Akihiko said, lavishing in the way the name rolled off his tongue. "Takahashi Misaki."

"Yep!" Aikawa said smiling.

_I'm sorry for what I'm going to do, Sensei _ Aikawa thought, before she began to think up of clever lies to feed the man in front of her.

* * *

**Hello there!**

**Geez, this was a super long chapter...well, writing it took a while anyways xD**

**And yes! Misaki ****_is _****alive! I don't think I possess the backbone to kill him off anyways, he's so sweet and cute.**

**I feel like a bad person, I keep ending chapters on cliffhangers and such...**

**Oh well. Halloween is coming up! I'm super excited, but I'll still try to get the next chapter out by next week, even though I'm going to be super busy and hopefully I won't die from stress...**

**Well, I'm going to go drown my worries in ice cream and hot pockets.**

**Thank you all so much for the follows/favorites/reviews! ;A; !**** I hope I deserve them and I'll do my best to keep everyone interested in the story!**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


	7. Chapter 6: Takahiro

**Chapter 6: Takahiro**

_It hurts._

The thought had burned itself into Takahashi Misaki's mind.

_It hurts…_

_Someone...anyone…_

_Help._

Each breath felt painful, and his head felt unbearably heavy as if someone were pressing down on it with great force - draining almost all of Misaki's strength as he struggled to stay conscious.

He couldn't open his eyes, much less move his body. If Misaki had any strength remaining in his body, he would've cried. He felt himself slowly drifting away, and a sudden terror ripped through him -

_What if I don't wake back up?_

Misaki began to panic and his breathing hitched, making it even more painful as he struggled for air as he breathed through his nose.

Against his will, he still felt himself become weaker and his frantic thoughts began to become fuzzy before he finally fell unconscious.

_Somebody...help me._

* * *

Takahiro anxiously waited at Misaki's bed side, waiting for any movement or sign that his brother would wake up. He tapped his feet impatiently, fiddling awkwardly with his hands in the silence of the room.

When Takahiro had requested Misaki have his own room, Nowaki had been confused as to why he would ask to separate the two.

"_Takahiro-san," _Nowaki had said. "_Wouldn't you much rather keep them together? I mean, they seem to be awfully close-"_

"_No." _Takahiro had interrupted. "_I mean...no...I, I think it would be much less stressful on Misaki if he were to be in a room by himself...like you said, we have no idea what's going to happen when he wakes up…" _

The doctor had eyed him curiously. Takahiro could tell that he wasn't buying a word of what he was saying, but if he had any doubts, the doctor must've shrugged them off. With Aikawa's permission as well, he had had the nurses move Misaki to a new, more private room to stay in.

Misaki had been moved to the opposite end of the hall, though it was not as far away as Takahiro would've liked, the doctor had told him it was the only other room left open where Misaki would have privacy.

The small room, unlike the previous one, had a very large window that overlooked the hospital grounds. Mid morning sunlight was peeking into the room between the curtains, the soft light resting on Misaki's sleeping face.

In this state, the young boy almost looked child like. Takahiro smiled to himself, thinking of the countless mornings that he had woken Miskai up in the morning for school when he was a child.

* * *

"Nii-chan! Do I have to go to school today~?" he remembered Misaki asking.

"Well, of course you do, Misaki-kun!" he said.

"How else will you learn and go to college?"

Misaki pouted. "But school is hard, Nii-chan. _You_ didn't go to college, so why do I have to then?!"

Takahiro's smile didn't waver.

"Because, Misaki-kun, I'd rather stay here and take care of you! Family needs to stick together, remember?"

Misaki had lowered his eyes down at the floor.

"...I guess. But...I wish Mom and Dad could've stuck with us, too."

Takahiro had frozen at Misaki's words. He had rested his hands on the small boy's shoulders and knelt down to meet his eyes with a grave expression.

"Misaki, we've talked about this. Mom and Dad can't come back, okay? So that means we have to stay together, no matter what. And that also means _you_ have to live your life to the fullest like they would've wanted you to." He said. The little boy had nodded, tears in his eyes.

"Now, go get ready for school, Misaki-kun! You don't want to be late." he said.

Misaki nodded once more and rubbed his eyes. He rolled out of his bed and quickly began changing into his elementary school uniform.

"Don't worry, Nii-chan!" he said, placing his hands on his hips and puffing his chest out proudly. "I'll make sure to make you proud! Even if that means going to school even though I don't really wanna..."

Takahiro laughed as he stood up, making Misaki smile even wider. Genuine laughter was rare from his older brother.

Suddenly, Misaki had grabbed Takahiro's legs and hugged him tightly, his head barely reaching above his brother's legs, causing him to wobble slightly.

"Misaki-kun…?" he asked curiously.

"Don't worry, Nii-chan." Misaki mumbled into his brother.

"I'll make sure that I'll never do anything to make you sad again."

Takahiro was stunned at the words that came from the child as he pulled away from him.

Misaki scurried to the door of his bedroom and opened it before pausing to look back at Takahiro.

"Hey...Nii-chan...is it okay if I make you breakfast today…?"

* * *

Takahiro gently placed his hand atop his present brother's head.

"You sure have changed, huh…" he said to no one in particular.

Misaki remained asleep. Takahiro sighed, as if it would let out all of the frustrations and anxieties he had been through in the short time. He leaned back in his chair and began to think about when times had been so much simpler.

When he was just a simple man, with a simple girlfriend and a simple, loving family.

Until the night that changed everything, when his parents had been driving home on that rainy night and crashed. Both of them had died on impact, and in an instant, Takahiro and Misaki's lives had changed drastically. Takahiro had had to give up his dreams of going to Mitsuhashi University in order to take care of Misaki who, age eight at the time, would've been put into foster care or taken in by another family member.

Takahiro had then spent the next ten years taking care of his little brother, along with the support of his girlfriend at the time, Minami and-

He gasped slightly, clenching his fists at the thought.

And his best friend...Usami Akihiko, or as Takahiro called him, Usagi-san.

Akihiko had become Takahiro's friend in high school, and the two in no time had become very close. Akihiko was a smart, scholarly guy who seemed very reserved and intimidating when you first met him, but over time as Takahiro got to know him, he realized that Akihiko was actually very kind and compassionate. He almost always gave him hugs or touched his shoulder, and was always looking out for him or trying to buy him things he needed, since Akihiko himself came from a wealthy background.

He had always treated him, Takahiro realized, like a treasure.

_Treasure me..._he thought.

_But, wouldn't that mean he…_

_No, no way! He just treasured our friendship, not _me _specifically..._

He paused, suddenly remembering Aikawa's words

_He was in love with you, you just never noticed…_

"NO." Takahiro said out loud, a little louder than he had intended.

"No…" he said more quietly.

_No, he was just close to me because we were such good friends._

_Men can't fall in love with other men, men can't…_

His eyes slid back over to Misaki.

His stomach clenched uneasily as he remembered the day Misaki had told him that he and Akihiko were together.

"_Nii-chan, no, Takahiro...I...I'm in love with Usagi-san."_

* * *

"What?" Takahiro had laughed. "What do you mean, you're in love with Usagi-san, Misaki-kun? I don't see a rabbit running around in here anywhere."**

He had continued to laugh until he had seen his brother's completely serious face. Slowly, he began to realize what his brother had meant.

"Wait...Usagi-san? He doesn't mean…" he looked at his best friend who, for the first time since he had known him, refused to meet his gaze.

"I'd say that I'm sorry, Takahiro, but I love Misaki, and to apologize for that would be like saying that I wished I didn't love him," he looked down at Misaki who was sitting on his left, with a look of complete adoration in his soft lavender eyes. "And I could never bring myself to say a lie so blatant or terrible as that."

Misaki's cheeks flamed at his comment, and they grew even hotter as Akihiko took his hand.

Takahiro had slowly began to process both the men's words, and the heavy meanings that they carried. All jokes and laughter had left his body, realizing that if his little brother were serious, that that would mean all of his hopes for him to get his own house, his own _family - _they would all be shattered.

"How long has this been going on?" he whispered, still in shock.

Misaki fidgeted uncomfortably where he sat, looking guilty and ashamed as he stared intently at his feet to avoid eye contact with his older brother. Out of the corner of his eye, Takahiro could've sworn he saw Akihiko give Misaki's hand a reassuring squeeze.

Misaki froze, before swallowing and meeting his brother's gaze.

"About four years, ever since I started school at Mitsuhashi University." he said clearly.

The three men were silent.

Takahiro's blood began to boil and anger filled his veins before he spoke again in a louder tone.

"So, what you're telling me, is that you've been _lying _to me for _four years?_" he asked, eyeing his little brother accusingly.

Misaki immediately shrank back at his brother's terrifying look before quickly nodding and hiding his face in his hands.

"I...I'm sorry, I didn't know how to tell you, I-" he stammered, but Takahiro wasn't listening.

He turned his attention to Akihiko who, unlike Misaki, didn't flinch at the man's gaze - he was far too used to looks of hatred and disgust from strangers and even family, that he easily kept a straight face.

Takahiro took it as a form of apathy, as if Akihiko didn't care about what he and Misaki had been doing - it set him off.

"And what about YOU!? Was everything you told me, about Misaki wanting independence, and not wanting to inconvenience me - were those all lies as well?!" he asked.

"Yes." Akihiko said simply, knowing that lying now was as pointless.

"We, well, mostly _I _lied so that Misaki could remain by my side." he bowed deeply. "I'm sorry for deceiving you, Takahiro."

"That's _bullshit_!" Takahiro yelled as he stood up, his knees hitting the glass coffee table between them and causing it to crash into Misaki and Akihiko's shins.

Misaki yelped in pain and grabbed his shins, and Akihiko too was momentarily stunned by the sudden pain. More concerned with Misaki's well being than his own, on instinct he took his hand and caressed the younger man's injured leg as if he could ease the pain.

This final display of affection set Takahiro's temper on fire.

"DON'T TOUCH HIM!" he roared, startling both men.

"Don't touch him, don't touch him! What the _fuck _have you done?! You've corrupted my brother, my _brother _- the one most important thing to me in the world!"

"And you've _ruined him_!" he snarled, walking around the coffee table and grasping the still stunned Akihiko by the front of his shirt, pulling him up so close to him that their noses were nearly touching.

Misaki was practically shaking in fear of the situation at hand as he weakly attempted to calm his brother down.

"N-nii-chan, I-"

"_STAY OUT OF THIS." _he yelled, causing Misaki to immediately shut down and tear up in frustration.

Akihiko grasped Takahiro's wrist, trying to ease his grip off of his shirt.

"Takahiro, be quiet or they'll hear you in the other room-"

"Why the hell should I care?!" he yelled, causing Misaki to cover his ears in fear of the loudness and venom in his beloved brother's voice.

"Usagi-san…" he whimpered.

Akihiko's eyes instantly darkened at the sound of his nickname in such a scared and pathetic tone.

He grasped Takahiro's wrist tighter.

"Now listen here, Takahiro. You can yell at me all you want, but don't you _dare _direct your anger at Misaki or where your own child in the other room could hear you yelling." he said in a cold tone, looking his best friend in the eyes wearing an equally intimidating expression.

"I won't allow it, and I don't know what I'll do." Akihiko's gaze never wavered.

Takahiro was shocked at his friend's words and the scary and serious look Akihiko was giving him. His shock quickly dissipated as a new fury built inside him.

"How dare _you," _Takahiro began, releasing Akihiko.

Akihiko stumbled backwards slightly, and Misaki quickly stood up to help steady him.

"How dare _you _be the one to ridicule _me?!" _he hissed.

Misaki and Akihiko froze, waiting for what Takahiro had to say as he stood menacingly as he clenched and unclenched his fists.

Takahiro waited, listening for any movement from Aikawa or Minami in the kitchen. When there was none, he spoke in a husky whisper.

"How dare you tell me I'm wrong?! How can I even calm down?! I just found out _now_ that my best friend and my brother are in love? And all because of _my _decision to let Misaki stay with you…" his hands began to tremble slightly and he adjusted his glasses before continuing.

"All because...because of you...you…" he looked at Akihiko with a look of utter betrayal in his eyes.

"You, what kind of friend are you, anyways?"

Akihiko tensed, yet his face remained blank and void of emotion.

"Takahiro, I know what this whole ordeal must look like," he said carefully, trying not to provoke the man again. "but I never had any bad intentions in mind-"

"Oh, you _liar._" he spat, glaring at Akihiko.

He quickly shut his mouth, unsure of what would set him off and what wouldn't. He figured his best option would be to remain silent.

Suddenly, he felt a slight tug on his long sleeved shirt from behind.

Looking over his shoulder, he saw Misaki timidly looking up at him, one hand tightly grasping the cuff of his sleeve. He looked up at him, his large green eyes rimmed with red as if he were trying his best not to cry.

"I...I think it's my turn to talk, Usagi-san." he said as he slowly stood up from the couch, releasing the sleeve of Akihiko's shirt. "I'll do my best."

His voice was scratchy, as if it were taking all of his will to keep the sob from rising in his throat - crying was usually what Misaki did when he got upset, but it frustrated him to no end that no one took him as seriously when he cried.

Right now, he needed to get through to Takahiro. If he was going to do that, he needed to get him to take him as seriously as possible - every word that he was about to say counted. He wasn't going to let his emotions get the better of him, and he sure as hell wasn't going to let his Usagi-san get yelled at and chastised alone.

Akihiko nodded in understanding and let Misaki stand in front of him. He knew that with Misaki's pride, and the fact he never wanted to cause trouble for others, that this was what he needed to do.

He was willing to do whatever it was to help his lover, even if that meant stepping aside for him.

Misaki trembled slightly as he faced his brother who, now, was looking at him angrily - giving him a look that resembled one he vaguely from his childhood. Takahiro would give him this same look whenever he had done something he shouldn't have, like when he wasted too much food when experimenting with his cooking or when he had spent money on manga that was meant to buy lunch items at school.

Misaki shook his head.

_I'm not a little kid anymore _he thought.

_I have to show Nii-chan I mean business! I can't let him look down on me!_

"Nii-chan, please calm down and listen to me, please?" he asked timidly.

Misaki paused before continuing, his brother's demeanor didn't change.

"Nii-chan, what is it that you want to hear? What will make you feel better?" he asked.

The tension in the room was so tense it felt tangible as Takahiro collected his thoughts. He let out a shaky breath and licked his lips before answering.

"What I want," he said, looking at his brother with a pitifully sad expression. "What I want is for this to not be true. Please, just fess up. This is a big joke, right? Haha, well, if it is you can stop pretending now, Misaki-kun."

Akihiko looked at the ground, his long silvery bangs covered his eyes and the grave expression they held. Misaki, however, gave his brother a sad smile.

"I'm sorry Nii-chan, but I can't make you feel better."

"Because this isn't a joke, by any means. And it never will be." Misaki said firmly.

Akihiko peeked from under his bangs and caught sight of Takahiro's expression.

His fury seemed to have reached its peak as he began to walk towards Misaki.

"N-nii-chan…?" Misaki asked.

Takahiro replied by savagely grabbing the younger boy's wrist and yanking.

* * *

All three men had began to shout at each other as Misaki struggled to escape his grasp, and this was at about the same time, Takahiro remembered, that Minami, Aikawa and Mahiro had entered the room.

Takahiro twitched and lightly touched the cheek that Misaki had slapped. In all his life, Takahiro could never remember a time Misaki had shown any form of violence whatsoever, whether it be towards himself or others.

When Misaki had slapped him, however, he had been so shocked that he didn't know how to react.

He clearly remembered what had happened after he had left - when he thought that he had slammed the door on his friendship and relationship with his brother at the time.

* * *

When he had stormed out of the room, Minami and Mahiro were close behind. Minami struggled to keep up with her husband's long strides while keeping a firm hold on her child.

They were silent as they made their way out of the condominium, Mahiro's cries pierced Takahiro's ears as he struggled to think about what had happened. Minami remained silent.

People gave the trio odd looks as they exited the building and headed in the direction of where Takahiro had parked their car. Takahiro wasn't sure what expression he was making, but whatever it was, as soon as people saw him coming they quickly moved out of his way.

Minami gave awkward smiles and silent bows of apologies to everyone who had the displeasure of crossing them, though she wasn't so convincing as Mahiro screamed and writhed in her arms.

"WHY DID WE LEAVE MI-CHAN! I MISS MI-CHAN AND UNAGI!" the toddler screamed over and over, his face began to turn a bright red as tears streamed down his face.

"Shhh, it's okay Mahiro-kun, it's okay. Please, stop yelling." Minami said weakly, trying to soothe her child as his small fists hit her back and head.

Minami sighed in relief when the family had finally reached their car. Takahiro got into the driver's seat and Minami got into the passenger seat as she rocked Mahiro in an attempt to sooth him.

Takahiro gripped the steering wheel tightly and stared straight ahead, but didn't but the keys in the ignition. He drummed his fingertips against the wheel and let out an exasperated sigh.

Minami watched her husband with concern - she had never seen Takahiro get angry, let alone explode in a rage like he had only minutes before.

They sat there for several minutes in silence. Mahiro had finally calmed down and was now sleeping in his mother's arms. She waited a few more minutes before she began questioning her husband.

"Takahiro...what happened in there?" she whispered, not wanting to stir her sleeping son.

"What happened…?" he asked. His grip tightened on the steering wheel as he began to chuckle. He looked over at her smiling, but with eyes that were not smiling at all.

"Well, the future that I had helped set for my brother has just been shattered before my eyes. And you know what else?!" he slapped his hands against the wheel as if he was trying to keep himself from bursting out laughing.

"It's all _my _fault, because I sent my brother to a house with a man who turned him gay!" Takahiro covered his mouth to muffle his laughter as Minami's blood ran cold.

"...so what you're saying is...Misaki-kun...is he…"

"Gay?" Takahiro laughed. "Looks like it! Hilarious, isn't it?"

Minami's expression went from shock to anger as she glared at her husband next to her.

"Really, Takahiro?" she said, making him stop cold.

"What?" he looked at her with an expressionless gaze.

"I mean," she began, gently rocking her son to keep him asleep. "Did you really blow up like that back there, just because Misaki-kun came out?"

He gaped at her.

"Minami, don't you understand? I want Misaki to have a nice, happy, _normal_, family of his own. But if he's gay, then there's no way he'll ever be able to have that! He'll be outcast from society, he can't get married, for God's sake he won't even be able to have his own _children_." Takahiro rambled.

Anger welled in Minami's chest as she looked at her husband.

"Well, did you _talk _to Misaki-kun about it? Did you tell him how you feel or even ask him how _he _feels?!" she asked, feeling just about fed up with everything that was happening that day already.

Takahiro blinked.

"...sort of? I guess...I mean, I think I said how I felt at some point, but I never really dug much deeper with it since I'm pretty sure he'll just grow out of this little phase soon enough." Takahiro rambled.

"Are you an _idiot!?_" Minami shouted, startling Takahiro and suprising herself as she covered her mouth. Mahiro screwed up his face and shifted slightly in her arms, but remained asleep.

"Really, Takahiro." she whispered more quietly this time. "You couldn't take a few minutes to let Misaki-kun explain himself? And what about Usami-san?! I thought you two were best friends! From what I've heard about him from Aikawa-san, he seems like such a respectable, charming man. What did _he _have to say on the matter?"

Takahiro was taken aback by his wife's sudden verbal attacks, and the fact that she didn't seem to be taking his side.

"Well...I, I don't really remember too well," Takahiro blushed a deep shade of red as his wife looked at him as if he were the biggest imbecile on the planet.

"I-I know he said something like he loved Misaki-kun, and Misaki-kun said stuff about loving him back…" Takahiro began to sweat at his wife's piercing gaze. He struggled to fix his obvious mistake in his choice of words, but each one seemed to just bury him deeper and deeper.

"I mean, I think all we'd have to do is find Misaki-kun a nice girl, and then everything should be fine, right…?" he asked timidly.

His wife just seemed to get even angrier.

"Oh, for God's sake, Takahiro! Let your own brother love who he loves, why don't you?!" Minami snapped, wrinkling her nose at him.

"Honestly, dear, is it really worth losing a friend _and _a brother over? Ridiculous." She shook her head at him, her long hair tickling the top of Mahiro's head.

"Oh, so you're taking _their _side, I see?" he said angrily. "So, it looks like my own wife won't even back me up."

He tossed his head to the side with a 'hmph'. Minami's own anger began to rise as she sighed in frustration at her own husband's immaturity.

"Look, let's leave this alone for now, alright? We can talk about it later when you're thinking clearly." she said, rubbing her forehead.

Takahiro nodded, and after Minami had put Mahiro safely into his car seat behind them, he put the key into the ignition.

The family pulled out of the parking lot and made their way back to their home, the sun setting behind them as they drove away, causing a soft glow to illuminate the condominium they left behind them.

* * *

Takahiro sighed and took off his glasses, pushing his overgrown bangs out of his eyes as he remembered the not-so-fond memories. He took a small cloth from his pocket and cleaned his already spotless glasses, his thoughts buzzing around in his head like a bad song.

He looked down at his little brother in his pitiful state. Replacing his glasses, he watched his brother's chest rise and fall as he took peaceful breaths, looking much more relaxed and calm then the last time he had seen him.

Yet, even though he was with his brother right now, he hadn't spoken to him since that time - he had had his cell and home phone numbers changed so that they wouldn't contact him. After a while, he hated to admit - he had started to regret his decision to change them.

He had brushed off this feeling with the excuse that he missed the spare time that he got when Misaki would watch Mahiro, but deep down he knew the real reason.

He missed his brother.

Looking at him now, he felt bitter that it had taken a serious accident for them to be able to see each other again. He gently brushed Misaki's long, thick bangs out of his eyes. Takahiro couldn't wait to see those familiar green irises again.

Though at first, when he had gotten the call that his brother had been in a car accident, his blood had run cold. His legs shook shakily as he remembered the terrified thoughts that had run throughout his head.

What if Misaki had died? What if he would have suffered the same fate as their late parents had - being victims to a dark, rainy night? What if, like their parents, Misaki would have died without Takahiro ever getting to say goodbye?

The thought itself scared Takahiro to his core. Shaking his head, he tried to get a grip on his emotions.

Misaki was going to live. And, if fate would have it, he would be able to get his brother back to how he was before. Misaki would live with him and Minami, even though Misaki and Mahiro would probably have to share a room.

Then, there was also the issue of Misaki's schooling and job to be considered, but Takahiro just pushed those doubts into the recesses of his mind. Honestly, he was too exhausted to think about nearly anything anymore at the moment.

It felt as if the whole world had begun to balance itself atop his shoulders. His anxiety had gotten worse recently and he was more irritable than not. He scratched his chin, feeling the slight stubble that had grown in the past few days. He looked at his reflection in the glass of the window.

He seemed much older. Lines crinkled around his almond-shaped eyes and his eyes seemed glassy and distant. His clothes were disheveled and he was in great need of a nice, hot shower, but he didn't have the motivation to take one. He was just so stressed that nothing really seemed to matter to him anymore.

He touched the glass, his reflection mirroring his movements. He looked at himself closer.

_Geez, what's been going on recently?_

He sighed deeply, and suddenly stiffened at the small sound of movement coming from Misaki's bed.

He slowly turned back around. His heart nearly stopped as he saw his younger brother begin to stir.

Misaki's eyes slowly opened. He blinked a few times as his eyes adjusted to the light. Takahiro didn't move.

Misaki yawned and rubbed his eye, gently sitting up and twitching in pain from his broken ribs.

He slowly looked around at his surroundings and immediately noticed Takahiro sitting in the chair next to his bed side.

"Nii-chan?" he asked, his voice hoarse from lack of use.

Takahiro's breath caught in his throat.

"Yes, Misaki-kun?" he said quietly.

Misaki looked at him with an extremely puzzled expression. His next question was nearly a whisper.

"Where am I?"

* * *

**** "Usagi" translates to rabbit (just in case if you didn't know) so that's why Takahiro thought Misaki was talking about a rabbit in the house (honhonhon I'm so clever but not really).**

**HELLO EVERYONE I AM SO SUPER SORRY THIS IS A WEEK LATE.**

**I've been super busy and stressed lately, please forgive me ^^"**

**Anyways...**

**I really wanted to attempt to show Takahiro's side since I felt bad about making him into a huge asshole, but then again...I don't think I really accomplished anything...or made him look any better...**

**Oh well. I wanted to put in more horrible things for him to say but, it physically hurts me to write mean things ;A; (especially homophobic things...I'M A PANSY).**

**I also had Misaki finally wake up, yay! (Allison was probably going to kill me if I put it off any longer, though...)**

**I hope everyone is doing alright! And I hope I'll be able to update quicker...**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**

**P.S. THE YOKOZAWA MOVIE AND LOVE STAGE! ANIME ARE COMING OUT IN 2014. REJOICE. 'TIS TIME FOR CELEBRATION!**


	8. Chapter 7: Treasure

**Chapter 7: Treasure**

_Ugh, what's going on?_

Takahashi Misaki felt woozy as he rubbed his eye and looked around the room he was in.

_Television...IV...itchy bed...am I in a hospital? _he thought, before looking down at himself.

_...huh? _he thought.

_How did my arm get broken…_

Misaki wiggled his fingers as he examined his cast before he continued to look around the room.

His eyes finally rested on his brother next to him who looked oddly out of character. His usually combed and trimmed hair was overgrown and greasy. His clothes seemed wrinkled and dirty, as if he hadn't changed them in a while. Also, his usually sweet and inviting face was covered in the beginning stubble of a beard, and his skin seemed oily, meaning he must not've bathed in a while.

_Is that really Nii-chan? _Misaki thought, doubting his own judgment.

_He looks kinda gross..._

"Nii-chan…?" Misaki asked, unsure of himself in his heavily sedated state.

"Yes, Misaki-kun?" Takahiro replied.

The room spun slightly and Misaki felt a little sick. Disoriented and confused, he only had one question on his mind.

"Where am I?"

* * *

"You're in the hospital, Misaki-kun." Takahiro said.

_Ah, so I was right..._he thought.

His head felt heavy and his thoughts were hazy, and a sharp pain hitched in his chest whenever he took a breath. His mouth felt dry as he tried to lick his already cracking lips.

"Could I have some water…?" he asked quietly. His throat was dry and made talking a bit painful.

"Ah, of course!" Takahiro said jumping up from his chair. "I'll be right back, just let me find a vending machine and get you some!"

"Okay…" Misaki replied weakly.

Without another word, Takahiro exited the room quickly and shut the door quietly behind him as he disappeared down the hall.

Misaki coughed slightly, wincing at the harsh pain in his chest. He relaxed his body and laid his head back into his pillows, letting the soft sunlight that was filtering through the window warm his face.

Misaki guessed that he had been on multiple sedatives and medications while he was at the hospital, since his stomach and head both seemed out of sorts. His stomach grumbled and churned uncomfortably and his head made his vision odd - the room still felt as if it were spinning.

Misaki closed his eyes and gripped the edge of his bed tightly with his left hand in an attempt to steady himself. It felt as if he had ridden a roller coaster too many times and was about to get sick.

_Kami-sama, please don't let me puke _he prayed silently.

He took deep breaths in through his mouth and slowly exhaled through his nose - a trick he had always used as a child when he felt sick. Slowly, he felt his stomach settle. Sighing in relief, Misaki opened his eyes again and gazed out the hospital room window.

He watched the trees outside tremble slightly in the wind and watched as gardeners pulled weeds and packed dirt in the garden below. Beyond the small garden, Misaki could see large office buildings and roads of Tokyo, and watched the small specs of people go to and fro about their business.

Misaki shifted awkwardly to his side and rested his cheek on his pillow before he blew his bangs out of his eyes.

_I wonder how long I've been here..._he wondered.

_Come to think of it, why am I in the hospital anyways…is it just because of my arm?_

Misaki dug deep into his thoughts, searching for the answers that he seeked.

He couldn't seem to recall them.

What he did remember, however, was that he was a student at Mitsuhashi University, majoring in engineering, 21 years old, and that he and his brother, Takahiro, were virtually inseparable.

_Wait, no..._Misaki thought, furrowing his brows.

_I feel as if...something's missing…_

_But what…_

Misaki felt as if what he was missing was right in front of him, but he couldn't reach it. Was it a place? An item? A person, perhaps, that he was trying to recall?

His head began to throb and he sighed in frustration. As Misaki went to run his fingers through his hair, he paused as he felt his fingers come in contact with the rough gauze.

His heart rate quickened as he felt that the gauze was wrapped around most of his head, causing his breathing to pick up speed and his chest to ache even more.

He placed his left hand on his chest, only to find more bandages wrapping themselves around his body.

_Wh-what? Wh-why am I so banged up?! Why does it hurt to breathe? And to think?! _

His panicked thoughts began to invade his mind before Takahiro came back with a bottle of water.

He immediately noticed Misaki's distress and came quickly to his side.

"Misaki-kun? What is it? What's wrong?" he asked in a soothing tone, gently placing one of his hands on his younger brother's shoulder.

"N-nii-chan," Misaki stuttered, shaking slightly. "What's happened to me? Why am I all banged up? What's going on?"

Misaki began hiccuping as his anxiety began taking over - something that had been pretty common with Misaki in his childhood. This time was different, however, since each hiccup made pain sharply pass through Misaki's chest and in turn made him panic and hiccup even more.

"Shh, Misaki, it's all right. Calm down, here, drink some water." Takahiro said soothingly, unscrewing the plastic cap on the top of the water bottle and handing it to his distressed little brother.

Misaki hesitated, but after Takahiro nodded encouragingly at him, he slowly took the bottle with shaky hands. He took small sips of water at first, and then began to take huge gulps as the cool water quenched the thirst in his throat.

By the time he had finished, he had downed about half of the water before handing the bottle back to Takahiro, who was patiently waiting for his younger brother to regain his composure.

After wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, Misaki took a few deep breaths until he was calm again. He looked at his brother with gratitude, and in return Takahiro nodded.

"I'm sorry, Nii-chan. I'm just a little...scared. What happened to me?" Misaki asked quietly.

Takahiro cleared his throat and adjusted his glasses before speaking.

"You were in a car accident, Misaki-kun, ah- don't worry!" Takahiro said suddenly, seeing the look of horror on Misaki's face. "You're okay, really! You're pretty lucky, actually. You only got a few broken ribs, a broken arm, and you hit your head."

Misaki gave Takahiro a droll stare.

"Nii-chan, how is _that _lucky?" he asked, making Takahiro scoff at him.

"Well, you're alive aren't you, Misaki-kun? Isn't that what's most important, in the end?" he asked, giving his brother a knowing look.

Misaki sighed in frustration again.

"Yeah yeah, I get it, Nii-chan. You don't have to treat me like a little kid." Misaki pouted, before playfully sticking his tongue out at his brother and making him laugh.

Misaki smiled, relieved that he had calmed down. Still, he was pretty shocked that he had been in an accident.

"Oh!" he said suddenly, a thought popping into his head. "No one else got hurt, did they?"

Misaki looked genuinely concerned - caring about others before himself was one of the traits that he himself and most people loved about Misaki.

"No," he lied, giving Misaki what he thought was a convincing smile. "No one else was injured...You, you were hit by a car as you were walking at night, but sadly the jerk drove off without stopping!"

Genuine hurt filled Misaki's eyes, before he lowered them down and looked at his own bandaged chest.

_Oh no, have I upset him?! _Takahiro thought worriedly.

"Well," Misaki began, looking thoughtfully at his injuries. "I guess, I'm lucky that it _was _me, Nii-chan. I mean, just think - if it were a child, or a woman or an elderly citizen, they could've gotten hurt pretty bad…"

He looked up at Takahiro and gave him a sweet smile.

"I guess this was just fate, huh?" Misaki giggled.

Takahiro was touched, and suddenly hugged his injured brother.

"Hey- ow! Nii-chan, you're heavy…" Misaki said as he awkwardly tried to hug Takahiro despite his casted arm.

"Misaki, you really are too sweet, aren't you?" Takahiro said.

"Eh?!" Misaki said, surprised by his older brother's sudden outburst.

"What are you talking about, Nii-chan? I'm just as plain and boring as everyone else…" he mumbled, blushing slightly. He had never been good at receiving compliments, regardless if they were from strangers, friends or even family. He didn't know what people saw in him, but apparently there was _something _there.

_I've missed you, Misaki _Takahiro thought as he pulled away from his brother.

He smiled and gently ruffled Misaki's chocolate colored locks.

"Now, you must be _starving_, Misaki. It's nearly lunch time now. Is there anything you want to eat?" Takahiro asked, searching for the hospital's food menu.

Now that he had mentioned it, Misaki realized, with a stomach growl, that he was really hungry.

"Yes, please! Um, but I'm not sure what I want…" He said shyly.

"Well, we'll pick something...ah! Here it is!" Takahiro said, triumphantly pulling out the laminated menu from a shelf on the side wall of the room. He began flipping through the menu and reading off food choices to his brother.

Nothing really seemed appetizing to Misaki, who shook his head for the seventh time at Takahiro's suggestion.

"Really, no again? I thought you liked Takoyaki. Oh, well...hm...oh! How about stuffed green peppers? That sounds good." Takahiro rambled.

Misaki stiffened.

_Green peppers…?_

Misaki didn't know why, but the vegetable sounded really good at the moment.

"Yeah, sure! How about some stuffed green peppers…" he said, racking his brain for where he had heard the food mentioned before.

"_I hate green peppers. Don't cook them." _he remembered someone telling him, but who…?

"_Yeah, well I'm going to make you eat a _whole pepper _tonight for dinner, then!" _he remembered himself saying and laughing maniacally.

He smiled and blushed slightly at the memory and looked fondly out the window. His smile faltered slightly, however, when he realized he couldn't quite place where the memory had come from.

_Nii-chan likes green peppers, so it wasn't him that would say something like that…_

Misaki shook his head.

_Oh, what am I doing! Thinking about peppers! Idiot! I need to focus on Nii-chan right now, and on how long I have to stay here…_

Takahiro happily called the nurse and ordered lunch for Misaki who, while he waited, had gone back to looking around the room.

He caught sight of his clothes in the far corner of the room, folded neatly on the countertop table next to a small sink.

"...Nii-chan?" he asked politely after Takahiro had hung up.

"Hm? Yes, Misaki-kun? What is it you need?" he asked cheerily.

"...could you bring me my clothes from over there so I can look at them?" he asked.

"Now, Misaki, the nurses aren't going to let you change out of your hospital gown and into your clothes - I mean, I know it may be itchy but-"

"No no, Nii-chan. That's not what I meant," Misaki said, cutting Takahiro off quickly before he could begin lecturing him like the doting brother Misaki knew he was.

"I just wanted to look at them and see if they had any rips or tears - if there are, I'll have to get them fixed right away, and I just wanted to look at them…" Misaki rambled quietly.

"Well, alright. If that's what you want, Misaki-kun." Takahiro quietly got up out of his chair and went to retrieve his brother's clothes. When he walked back and handed them to Misaki, Misaki was instantly relieved to feel something familiar and soft - unlike the itchy sheets and hospital gown he was covered by.

He looked at Takahiro gratefully, and Takahiro nodded back at him.

"Well, I'll be right back, Misaki-kun." Takahiro said, heading for the door. "I'll be back soon, I just have to use the bathroom. If the nurse comes, don't forget to thank her for the food!"

"Yeah, yeah…" Misaki said under his breath. "Geez, what does he think I am? Some kind of rude behemoth?"

Misaki chuckled quietly to himself as he studied his clothes, looking for any rips or tears in them and savoring the feel of soft cotton in his fingers. He awkwardly moved his casted arm so that he could flip around his jacket.

Surprisingly, there weren't any tears in the jacket, though it did have quite a few stains on it from dirt and oil that must've been on the asphalt. His jeans, however, had holes in the knees - a common pet peeve of Misaki, since he usually ruined his pants this way by rolling around on the floor from cringe attacks, or - even worse - whenever a new chapter of his favorite manga _The Kan _was out, making him prone to extreme fanboying.

Misaki sighed and folded the pants up neatly and putting them on top of his jacket. There was no side table to his left - just a small one on his right, and it was just out of his immediate reach.

Shakily, he attempted to put the small stack in his fingertips of his casted arm, and slowly moved to put them on the table. Leaning as far as his body would allow, Misaki suddenly yelped at he felt a sharp pain in his side, causing him to lose his grip on the pile. Cursing, he tried to catch it - reaching for anything whatsoever, he only managed to grasp the mahogany colored scarf that had been rolled up inside his coat as the rest of his clothes had fallen to the floor.

Defeated and feeling like a moron, he retreated back into his original position on the hospital bed while clutching the scarf in his hands.

_Crap. There's no way I'll be able to pick those up _he thought.

_Oh no, oh no! I'm going to look so rude! What if the nurse thinks I threw my clothes on the floor on purpose! _

_I'm going to look so awkward!_

Misaki continued to worry in his head over the simple thing while wrapping the scarf around his uninjured hand. He sank into the bed, pulling the covers over his head as he pressed his face into the scarf, letting the warm and soft fabric brush his slightly bruised face.

He inhaled deeply, then stopped. He uncovered his head and lifted the scarf to his nose again, this time inhaling deeply a few more times, closing his eyes and racking his brain for the familiar scent the scarf seemed to have.

_Smells like...cigarettes? Clove cigarettes maybe? _he thought, baffled by the odd odor on his clothes.

Misaki didn't smoke, and never wanted to in his life for as long as he lived. He hated the smell and he didn't want lung cancer any time soon. He couldn't imagine why his scarf would have any other scent on it than his own.

He sniffed it one last time and, surprisingly, he didn't mind the smell of the cigarettes. They seemed to bring a sort of peace to him, and calm him down, like as if the smell reminded him of a safe, warm place.

It reminded him of…

His thought process faltered.

_Of what? _he thought.

He hated the feeling of having a thought just out of reach. It felt as if the answer was so simple and he should know it, no, he _knew _that he knew it, but he just couldn't place it. This feeling had happened most of the time during his life at school, when he couldn't solve a simple math problem that even the slowest of kids in the classroom understood, or when he was taking an English test and he knew a word translated from Japanese into English but he just couldn't remember what it was.

It frustrated him to no end and made his stomach ache just thinking about it.

Shaking his head, he decided that he should just put the problem out of his mind for now, and maybe the answer would just come to him later.

_Maybe it's just a coincidence? _he wondered. In his head, the idea made sense. But in his gut, he knew that that probably wasn't true.

"Oi, Misaki-kun! I'm back!" Takahiro said cheerfully while coming in, startling Misaki and retrieving him from his deep thoughts.

When Takahiro entered, he was carrying a large tray with what looked like Misaki's lunch.

"I happened to run into the nurse outside the room and offered to bring in to you," Takahiro said with a smile. "Though, I don't know if that was the best idea. She was pretty cute, Misaki-kun, you probably would've liked to see her."

"Nii-chan!" Misaki yelled, half jokingly and half serious. "Don't say such perverted things!"

Takahiro laughed at Misaki who, for effect, covered his ears as he blushed and glared at Takahiro before he placed the tray of food next to Misaki on the bed. In the process, Takahiro accidentally stepped on Misaki's clothing that had fallen to the floor and gave him a questioning look.

"Misaki-kun, why are these on the floor?" he asked as he carefully picked them up and brushed them off before placing them neatly on the side table.

Misaki blushed slightly and, without really meaning to, he silently slid his hand under the covers of his blanket, hiding the scarf from view so that Takahiro wouldn't ask to take it from him.

_What the heck am I doing? _he thought in the back of his mind.

_Why am I being so protective over a stupid scarf?_

"Ah, well, I tried to put them on the side table using my broken arm, but I dropped them." he said shyly. "I would've gotten them, but my chest hurts too much to lean over that far to pick them up off the ground…"

Takahiro's eyes were sympathetic as he placed a large hand to Misaki's forehead.

"Does it hurt really bad? Do you need me to call the nurse and request that they put you on more painkillers?" he asked in a concerned tone.

"No, it's fine, really!" Misaki said quickly.

_Ugh, that medicine makes me feel sick anyways - I'd rather deal with the pain than the nausea._

"All I really want to do right now is eat, actually." Misaki said, looking down at his lunch hungrily, his stomach growled in agreement.

He looked down at his delicious stuffed green peppers. Takahiro handed him the half full bottle of water Misaki had drank from earlier to drink with his food.

He slowly slipped his hand out of the scarf, keeping it hidden from his brother's view as he took his hand out from under the covers, before placing the tray on his lap. At first, he tried using his fork with his right arm, which resulted into him fumbling with the fork and nearly dropping it on the floor.

Blushing profusely, Misaki took the fork into his left hand and began eating his lunch, though more shakily than he would have liked since he was right handed.

"Is it good?" Takahiro asked, watching his brother eat small bites of his peppers and take sips of water in between.

"Mhm, it's delicious!" Misaki said, his mouth still full of food. He swallowed it quickly before speaking again.

"Hey...Nii-chan?" he asked, poking his pepper with his fork.

"Yes?" Takahiro said.

"Do...do we happen to know anyone who smokes?" Misaki asked quietly, thoughtfully chewing on another bite of his food.

"Where did this question come from all of a sudden, Misaki-kun?" Takahiro asked, laughing nervously.

"Well, my, ah…my clothes sort of smelled like cigarette smoke, so I was wondering…" Misaki lowered his eyes to his lap, putting his tray with him mostly eaten lunch next to him.

"I...I was just wondering, were you the only one to visit me while I was asleep? You're not smoking, are you Nii-chan?!" Misaki asked in a panicked voice.

"Oh, no no! Of course not, Misaki-kun! I'd never start smoking!" he reassured him.

"Hmm, but they smelled like cigarettes, huh? Maybe I should ask the doctor and see if any of the nurses have been smoking around patients when they're not supposed to be…" Takahiro murmured to himself.

"Ah, no no! It's fine, really! It's not that big of a deal, I was just wondering, I mean, I don't want to stir up trouble or anything…" Misaki rambled, trying to convince his brother that everything was fine.

The last thing Misaki wanted to do was to complain about the hospital staff - for all he knew, he could've been imagining the smell all along, which would only lead to embarrassment and more unpleasant mistakes to cringe over later.

After finally convincing Takahiro it was nothing, the siblings talked with each other for hours.

Misaki listened to Takahiro ramble about work and life as a married man, and more than one or two adorable stories about Mahiro.

Misaki didn't talk as much as his brother had, however, because of the fact that a lot of his memories seemed vague and uncertain. He couldn't remember where he had been living the past few years, though he remembered going to Mitsuhashi University everyday. Takahiro had insisted that Misaki had been living with him and his family, but it just didn't seem to add up in Misaki's mind.

He also remembered getting a job at Marukawa publishing, but how or why had he…? He couldn't remember the exact reason, but he did remember his frequent visits and errands for the famous artist and author of his favorite manga, _The Kan, _so he just assumed that was the reason he had come to work there.

Though, it bothered Misaki that he felt like a lot of important details of the last few years were missing, Takahiro seemed even more cheerful than usual, and not at all alarmed by Misaki's memory lost.

Even though Takahiro had explained what the doctor had said about Misaki's head injury and how he may be prone to memory loss, he had expected his brother to be a little more...concerned.

_I guess Nii-chan's just glad I'm alright _he thought.

_Ah, oh well. Like he said, I'll probably remember what I've forgotten eventually._

The whole time Takahiro and Misaki had been talking, Misaki had held his scarf in a tight grip underneath the covers. For some reason, the scarf seemed to soothe his raging thoughts and frustration at the plot holes of his memories.

He never remembered buying it, or Takahiro buying it, so it must have been given to him from someone else that he couldn't recall.

_Maybe a crush or a cute girl? _he thought.

It would make sense, being that he felt so attached to it and the fact that none of his other relatives besides Takahiro ever gave him presents on holidays or his birthday.

_Well, whoever they are, I have to remember them and fast. I'm sure they'll be devastated if I can't recall their name, let alone their face. _

* * *

As the sun had begun to set, after many hours of talking, nurses checking in on Misaki and just scheduled medications and injections, Misaki was absolutely exhausted.

As he struggled to keep his eyes open, Takahiro stretched in the chair next to him, lifting his arms high over his head and letting out a monstrous yawn..

"Well, Misaki-kun, I have to get going now. Visiting hours are almost over and I have to get back to Manami and Mahiro back home." Takahiro said, kissing his brother's forehead as he stood up.

"Don't baby me," Misaki grumbled in reply. "'m not a little kid, 'n I don't need any forehead kisses…"

"Yeah yeah, I hear you loud and clear, Adult-san. Now get some rest, and I'll visit you tomorrow."

Takahiro said quietly, opening the door as he watched the vivid sunset come through the window and cast shades of oranges, pinks and blues across the room, enveloping Misaki in a warm light as he began to doze off.

"G'night, Nii-chan." he breathed, curling slightly to one side. Unknown to Takahiro, Misaki had his precious scarf held against his chest as a means to keep it close to his heart - even while he was asleep.

"Sweet dreams, Misaki-kun." Takahiro whispered, quietly shutting the door behind him.

* * *

As the night shift for nurses rolled around, Nowaki Kusama - again - had been asked to work overtime.

He sighed as he removed his doctor's coat, placing it neatly in his locker in the hospital locker rooms as he changed back into his regular clothes. He dared to glance at the clock, and physically cringed at how late the time was.

_Ah, it's 12:30 _he observed.

_Hiro-san is not going to be pleased with me one bit, I bet._

The large man sulked slightly as he checked his text message inbox, looking for Hiroki's reply to his texts that he was going to be late again. He frowned when, like always when Hiroki was mad, his replies had been short, monosyllabic and lacked punctuation.

His lover, who was also a literature professor, must have been really bothered this time if he was willing to send Nowaki such incomplete or inarticulate messages like those.

_Oh no, I must've really hurt his feelings this time…_

Sighing, Nowaki finished lacing up his sneakers and shut his locker closed. He quietly placed his files and paperwork to take home in his small backpack before throwing it over his shoulder.

Taking work home was, he could admit, a pain in the ass, and made him understand why Hiroki hated grading papers so much. Not that Nowaki would complain, but he already tended to so many patients and extra patients during the day, that having to work on their paperwork at home was just even more stressful as it was exhausting.

Nowaki sighed yet again as he stood up to exit the locker room.

As he began walking towards the exit, a certain patient suddenly crossed the giant doctor's mind.

_I wonder how Takahashi Misaki-kun is doing…_ he wondered.

Nowaki had been one of the first responders to help perform Misaki's surgery and, though he would never admit it to anyone, it hadn't been an easy job. Nowaki had been really worried about the young adult, and even more worried so when Misaki's brother, Takahashi Takahiro-san had requested Misaki have his own room.

Nowaki had personally been totally against the idea, but he had kept his mouth shut, not thinking that it was appropriate for him to go against a patient's family members best interests.

_Maybe I should check on him? _Nowaki considered, pausing at the door of the exit with his hand on the knob.

_...I'll just peek in on him. He's in room 623, so I'll make it quick. _he convinced himself.

Nowaki quietly made his way through the hospital towards Misaki's room from the locker room, nodding to janitors and night shift nurses as he walked through the halls of the building of the emergency room.

He entered the elevator and listened as it creakily took him up to the sixth floor. When the doors reopened, he quietly made his way to Misaki's new room on the opposite end of the hallway of the room he had first been placed in.

When he reached Misaki's room, he tapped on the door lightly three times and pressed his ear to it, waiting for a reply. When there was none, he slowly opened the door and peeked in to find Misaki fast asleep.

He smiled, looking at the boys peaceful face as he slept as the moonlight illuminated his pale skin.

"...oh." he whispered to himself, noticing that someone had left the curtains open. He tip toed his way over to the window and tightly drew them, pausing as he heard Misaki murmur lightly in his sleep.

He looked over at Misaki, and froze when he saw something red peeking out at him from under the covers, even in the darkness of the room.

_Blood? _Nowaki thought, assuming the worst.

He took a closer look, lightly lifting the blanket from Misaki with his forefinger and thumb., holding his breath until he sighed in relief.

It was just a red scarf. What he had seen was the scarf Misaki had been holding to his chest, and Nowaki recognized it as the same one the boy had been wearing the day he had been emitted into the emergency room for surgery.

_That must be special to you, huh? _Nowaki thought, chuckling to himself as he replaced the covers, causing Misaki to smile and snuggle into them in his sleep.

Nowaki silently made his way to the door, and looked back at Misaki one last time before shutting it.

_I bet Usami-san gave him that scarf _Nowaki thought as he walked down the hallway.

He, unlike most people, knew the relationship Akihiko and Misaki had together, since his own lover, Hiroki Kamijou, was Akihiko's childhood friend and often complained about how doting Akihiko was of Misaki.

Nowaki smiled to himself, remembering the joy on Misaki's face even though he was sleeping, as he held the scarf to his chest.

_I hope Hiro-san will be able to give me something like that to treasure, one day._

And with that thought, Nowaki felt all of the heaviness and stress from the day lift off of his chest and shoulders as he made his way home to where Hiroki would be expecting him.

* * *

**Helloooo everybody!**

**I was actually able to write this pretty quickly, so yay! Suprise update!**

**Thank you everybody for the favorites/follows/reviews! It makes me feel like what I'm writing is actually worth reading ;u;!**

**(Also I think I messed up Manami's name - it's supposed to be Manami not Minami so I'll have to go back and fix that wherever I messed up. Oh well. I'm probably the only one that cares about that small detail anyways...)**

**Plus writing this fanfiction and keeping it updated has been the single most productive thing I have done in five years. Thanks yaoi for setting my priorities straight (well not straight since it's yaoi and there's nothing straight about it *ba dum tss* ok I'm sorry I'll stop)**

**Anyways I hope you all are having a super awesome day c: Now I must go catch up on the gay glasses anime and then I'll start working on the next chapter!**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


	9. Chapter 8: Stories and a Sleepless NIght

**Chapter 8: Stories and a Sleepless Night**

Night had fallen at the hospital, and yet Usami Akihiko could not sleep.

He sighed in frustration, tossing and turning for what felt like the thousandth time that hour.

He had just too many things buzzing around in his head to focus on sleep, and whenever he tried closing his eyes, they just ended up back open as he stared blankly at the plain white ceiling above him.

By now, his eyes had adjusted to the darkness in the seemingly pitch black room, and he had taken it upon himself to count the tiles in the ceiling.

He was extremely uncomfortable, and the only thing that kept him from thrashing in frustration was the fact that his legs were both elevated in small hammocks. This fact also made it impossible for him to roll over or even lay on his side.

Akihiko had always had the habit of pacing when he had a lot on his mind, and in the past, he recalled, it often kept him from sleeping whenever he had had a manuscript to write. In his childhood, his mother would often scold him whenever he would wander around their large and luxurious mansion at night, due to all of the added stress life at home caused him.

Now, being stripped of this habit felt as irritating and frustrating as if Aikawa had told him to quit smoking cold turkey that day. He softly banged his head into his pillow, desperate for the sweet release of sleep to overtake him.

He squinted to check the time that the clock on the far wall of the hospital room read.

_1:45 AM _he thought bitterly.

Aikawa had left when visiting hours had ended over five hours ago, leaving Akihiko in this bored, irritable and lonely state. He repeatedly banged his head into his pillow, and stopped suddenly, slowly opening his eyes.

_Aikawa..._he thought.

_What you told me...is it really true?_

* * *

"What do you mean he's _missing_?!"

"It means exactly what I said," Aikawa had said, lying through her teeth. "Misaki-kun is missing, well, technically anyway."

All of the excitement that had once been in Akihiko's demeanor had left completely.

"Missing...but, _how_?" He asked, looking at her with hurt in his eyes. "Why?"

Aikawa shifted uncomfortably, trying to think up the most believable and smooth story that she could think of off of the top of her head.

Digging back deep into her mind, she faintly remembered a conversation she had had with a good friend of hers that was a chief editor of a branch of the manga department at Marukawa Publishing, Takano Masamune.

She remembered how he had told her the odd story of how the person he had loved had seemed to disappear one day completely, without saying so much as a word to him or leaving a hint of where he had gone - not even in his files.

_Sorry, Masamune-san, but I'm going to steal your experiences a bit. _she thought silently.

"Yes, missing." she repeated. "One day, he just...left. He didn't say why, or even where he was going. He just...left."

Akihiko looked at her doubtfully.

"You're _sure _there's no clues to where he could have gone to? Haven't we tried looking for him?" he asked, trying to remain calm.

It was difficult and scary to be in the dark about a situation, but now it was double so with the fact that he was fuzzy on many memories. If what Aikawa said was true, that his lover really was missing, how would he even begin to search for him when he couldn't even remember what hair color or eye color the boy had?

Aikawa could tell that Akihiko was second guessing himself, which was convenient for her if she was going to get him to believe her story.

"Usami-sensei, we've searched everywhere and have tried everything to try to find him, but we've had zero luck - we couldn't even find his personal records or medical information." she said, giving him a serious and what she hoped was a sympathetic look.

Akihiko wasn't even really focused on Aikawa that much anymore, but more of on his own thoughts. Aikawa could practically see the wheels turning painfully in his head, which was much like a clock trying to tell the time when it was missing most of its gears.

"That shouldn't be possible...what was his name again? Ta...Ta...Ta-something Misaki, right?" he asked, looking at her with his silver brows furrowed in concentration as he tried to remember Misaki's name.

_I can't tell him Misaki's real name _she thought.

_Then he'd easily be able to just look into Misaki's information or just simply ask around and find him wherever he is._

_Looks like I'll need to get creative. _

Swallowing, she racked her brains for memories - memories of books, manga, movies - anything that gave her an easy last name to assign to Misaki.

"Yes, you're mostly right." she said. "His name...his name is Tatsumi Misaki."

_Ugh. Couldn't I have thought of something better?! Idiot!_

She tried to seem as convincing as possible, sweating slightly as she waited for Akihiko to respond.

"Misaki, huh?" He said, looking up at the ceiling. "Misaki…"

He turned his head to look at Aikawa before speaking again.

"Well, when I get out of here, I'm going to keep looking for this Tatsumi Misaki until I find him." His eyes shone with great hope and pride as he gave her a reassuring smile.

_He took the bait. _

"Yes, I'm sure if you try hard enough, you can accomplish anything you put your mind to, Usami-sensei!" She smiled.

_You liar _she thought sourly to herself.

Aikawa knew that the name Tatsumi Misaki was fake, which meant that it didn't matter how long or even where her author looked, there was no way he was going to find him.

She was giving him false hope and setting him up for certain failure.

_I'm the worst._

As Aikawa sat in self loathing, her author next to her was pumped and ready to go. If he wasn't injured, he would've wanted to start his search that moment - he was willing to search anywhere and do anything if that meant that he would be able to find Misaki.

Most of all, and what he was most curious about, was what had happened that had caused Misaki to disappear so suddenly.

"Tatsumi Misaki," he breathed, gazing out the small window of his room. "I wonder, where in this world could you possibly be…"

Little did the author know, his beloved Misaki was only down the hall, painfully close but yet still so far away.

The psychical distance that Akihiko believed was between him and his lover was comparable in size to a chasm. But in reality, and unknown to Akihiko, the actual distance was more comparable to a crack.

_Where are you? _was the only thought occupying his mind.

_Where are you, Misaki?_

* * *

Akihiko laid in his bed, the same thoughts still occupying his mind even in the late hours of the seemingly endless night.

_I never even got to learn what he looked like _he thought, feeling depressed.

Just before he was able to learn more about Misaki from Aikawa, visiting hours had ended and Aikawa had been asked to leave. She had already broken the visitation rules for the past few days while she had waited for Akihiko to wake up. The only reason the hospital had let her stay was that she had promised them she would leave as soon as he woke up and after she had gotten to spend some time with him.

_Just my shitty luck _he thought bitterly, pouting by himself as he looked at his own reflection in the hospital room window.

He studied himself, noting the cuts and bruises that covered his usually unmarked face. He lowered his chin to get a better look at the dark circles under his eyes, frowning at the unattractive contrast they made with his pale skin.

He cursed, realizing that if he didn't get any sleep soon that his dark circles were only going to get darker.

He sighed, covering his forehead with his arm. What he wouldn't give to be able to go back home to his own comfy bed - back to where things were familiar, unlike the foreign and sterile environment of the hospital.

_Home…_

Akihiko smiled slightly, remembering the only semi-good news he had received that day when his doctor Nowaki Kusama had come to check in on him.

* * *

"Really?! That's great!" Aikawa had said, happily clutching Akihiko's arm as Nowaki had told them the great news.

"Yes, we're thinking of releasing Usami-san from the hospital in the next day or so," Nowaki said, beaming at the two of them.

"Well, from what we've gathered from the head injury pictures we took of the damage to Usami-san's brain, we're guessing most of whatever memories he's missing now will slowly come back to him as time progresses."

"The most effective way we've helped patients suffering from memory loss in the past is by allowing them to go to familiar places, indulge in familiar sights and sounds or even just talking to friends or relatives can help make the pieces click together, so to speak." Nowaki continued as he flipped through the papers on his clipboard, yet still making the effort to smile kindly at Akihiko as he did so.

"Since the anesthetic has worn off by now, you should be able to remember generic things about your life or yourself, like your age, your name, your occupation, etcetera. But, we think the best thing we can possibly do for you right now is to let you go home as soon as possible." Nowaki said.

Aikawa cheered again before tightly hugging her author beside her, who seemed stunned at Nowaki's words. Although Akihiko was excited to hear the news still he hesitated before celebrating himself as he asked the doctor a few questions.

"Uhm, Kusama-san? Are you sure it's alright for me to leave in such a short time? I mean, what about my head injuries and my legs…" Akihiko asked.

Nowaki came closer to him and rested a reassuring hand on the man's shoulder.

"Usami-san, please believe me when I say I would _never _approve of your release if I thought you still needed to recover. Your legs are probably just numb from being elevated for so long, plus you've been laying still for days. We'll have you put into casts with more mobility so that you'll be able to walk if needed, but you'll probably have to be in a wheelchair for a while while you're recovering." Nowaki said.

"Please, don't stress over this. Tomorrow, we'll change your bandages and check your head injury, alright? You mainly suffered from a large amount of road rash, so you should be alright to heal at home as long as you have someone you can call if you need any help. But," He looked at Aikawa from the corner of his eye. "I'm sure Aikawa-san would be willing to help you if you were in trouble, Usami-san. She's a good friend."

Aikawa blushed at the compliment and nodded, giving her author a smile before excusing herself to go to the restroom. In the meantime, Nowaki had given Akihiko a routine check up and asked him a few questions on how he was doing.

By now, Akihiko was able to recall much more information than when he had first woken up, which pleased Nowaki greatly.

Akihiko recalled that he was a man from a wealthy background, an author and many things about himself that included his personality. He knew that during his childhood, he hadn't gotten along well with his brother, Usami Haruhiko or his brother's friend Ryuichiro Isaka, whom he remembered were both (irritatingly enough) usually annoying and could be huge assholes at times. He also remembered that Kamijou Hiroki was his childhood friend, who, on the other hand, was usually short-tempered, in a bad mood and almost always had his nose in a book, but he and Akihiko had been friends for so long that he was more of a brother to Akihiko than his actual brother.

He felt as if there was someone he was forgetting, but he ignored it - he would probably remember their name eventually.

Usami Akihiko did what he wanted and almost always got what he wanted, whether it was a tangible object or if he simply wanted to go wild with his imagination when writing.

Though, as Nowaki had been expecting when he had asked, Akihiko was in the dark about many of his older memories - childhood memories, teenage experiences and even the plots to his own novels were nowhere to be found in Akihiko's memory. Many events or experiences were hazy, and if he tried to focus on one for too long his head would begin to throb, so he tended to just leave them be.

Nowaki assured him that this was a normal occurrence with most patients suffering from head injuries, and that eventually it should begin to happen less and less frequently.

After talking for a while, Akihiko was finally convinced, and sighed deeply in relief that he was going to be able to go home in a few days.

Though, as he talked to the doctor, he couldn't shake the feeling that he seemed oddly familiar.

_Have...have we met before? I feel as if I know this man... _he thought, silently analyzing Nowaki. Eventually, he just shrugged.

_Oh well. It's probably nothing._

When Aikawa returned, Nowaki went briefly over the basic plan one more time and made sure Akihiko had taken his proper medications before bowing and leaving the two alone once more, giving them both a cheerful wave as he went on his way to finish the rest of his shift.

When they were alone, Aikawa sighed deeply and gave Akihiko's shoulder a tight squeeze.

"Isn't this great?! You get to go home soon!" she said happily. Akihiko smiled at her.

"Yes, it is...but," he said suddenly, furrowing his brows. "I can't shake the feeling I know Kusama-san from somewhere. Have we met before, Aikawa?" he asked innocently, taking a sip of water from the cup that was placed on the side table.

"Oh, Nowaki-san?" she asked. "Yeah, you know him."

"You write about him and Kamijou-san all the time in your gay novels." She said bluntly, making Akihiko choke on his water in surprise.

"_WHAT?!_" He yelled in surprise as Aikawa laughed at his shocked face.

"Jesus is there anything _else _I should know about that goes on in my books?!" he asked, still coughing slightly after practically inhaling his water.

"Oh, yes! Why didn't I think of it before!? You _have _to know the plot of all of your ongoing series if you're going to get back to work as soon as possible when you get home!" Aikawa said. She continued babbling as Akihiko groaned loudly at the promise of work, listening half heartedly to what she was saying.

Aikawa had babbled on and on about his books right up until the time the hospital made her leave, and as annoyed as Akihiko had been, the silence that greeted him after the hours of company seemed very...lonely.

_Maybe I should try to get some sleep _he had thought. He had closed his eyes and attempted to go to sleep, but instead he spent the next couple of hours thinking only of Misaki.

* * *

_How did I honestly think I would get any sleep anyways? _he thought, coming back from him memories from the previous events that day.

Shifting back onto his back, he dared to check the clock again.

_2:30AM_

He groaned, lightly hitting his forehead with his palm.

"Fall asleep, dammit." he whispered to himself.

It wasn't until the sun began rising that Usami Akihiko was finally able to pass out from exhaustion - he finally had fallen asleep with one arm tucked under his head and the other laying across his chest as the morning sunlight made his silver hair shimmer.

But still, even in his dreams, Misaki was the only thing occupying his mind.

* * *

**BAM surprise update TWO days in a row :D~**

**(I busted my butt to finish this chapter. I hope it's ok even though it feels like it's a little short...)**

**Thank you everyone for reviews/follows/favorites (;w; ) (I know I say it almost every time I update BUT I MEAN IT!)**

**I really hope I can update soon again I have a scene I really want to write but I don't want to rush to get to it ;n;**

**(and YES ALLY IF YOU'RE READING THIS THERE WILL BE MORE MISAKI.)**

**Also shout out to my friends Allison, Jordan and Fiona for being my Aikawas and yelling at me to keep writing :3 (and convincing me that what I have is good before I upload it...seriously I probably wouldn't ever upload anything without them)**

**I hope everyone is doing amazing! **

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


	10. Chapter 9: Watching

**Chapter 9: Watching**

The next few days seemed to pass painfully slow for Usami Akihiko.

For Akihiko, his days had been spent getting bandages changed and medicine adjusted, while also impatiently awaiting his day of release. Aikawa still had work to do and other authors to take charge of back at Marukawa publishing, leaving Akihiko to suffer in severe boredom in her absence. He had kept himself busy by creating stories in his own mind - a trick he used to do as a child to keep himself sane during the long hours of time he had to spend when visiting or hosting family members.

One of these stories, he had begun to imagine, was that of a prince and a genderqueer princess - one of which who was a boy forced into being a princess, and who was punished for enjoying his one passion - writing.

He had been formulating the details and plot in Aikawa's absence - it wasn't like his family was going to come visit him, and his only other friend was Hiroki (who had called him to inform him that, like always, he "had way too many shitty essays to grade" and "who even lets imbeciles like these go to M University?!").

_Aikawa will eat this story up _Akihiko thought, sighing faintly as the minutes ticked by as he waited for her to come pick him up after her routine work was finished.

Even though his legs had healed slightly and been recasted and had become slightly more movable, as Nowaki had explained to him before, there was no way he'd be able to walk or even take the train home - at least not by himself. Aikawa had assured him that she'd be much more comfortable if he'd let her drive him home, and he had agreed.

He wasn't even entirely sure he'd be able to find his apartment on his own anyways, but he didn't want his already stressed and doting editor to worry about him.

Now, he was sitting in a wheelchair provided by the hospital as he looked out the window of his room. He had grown tired of just lying around in his bed all day long ago, and the nurses thought the wheelchair could be a good opportunity to get some circulation flowing through his legs.

He sighed as he observed the outside world. The sky, he thought, looked overcast as if it was going to rain later that day.

_Boy, _he thought bitterly.

_If I liked the rain before, I certainly don't now._

Rain, snow, storms of any kind - he thought he'd love to never see any of them again. The typhoon that had swept through Tokyo had been a major factor in the crash that had stripped him of so many of his memories and mobility. His legs were going to be a pain in the ass to move around in, even with crutches - despite his appearance, Akihiko had never been all that talented when it came to sports or balance.

_I'd much rather have Aikawa wheel me out of here today than embarrass myself trying to limp all the way to the exit._

Akihiko would rather show a little bit of weakness for once then accidentally fall over on their way out. As much as he hated relying on Aikawa after all of her help so far, he really, _really _didn't want to draw unwanted attention to himself.

He ran his fingers freely through his hair, relieved that after multiple changings, his bandages on his head were finally removed for good. He lightly scratched the back of his head, feeling his slightly greasy silver hair between his fingertips.

He scoffed, feeling gross due to the fact that he hadn't been able to take a shower in his own home for the past few days. Looking down at himself, still in his ugly and uncomfortable hospital gown, he missed his own clothes as well - which had, unfortunately, been so ripped up and bloody that the hospital had thrown them away shortly after he had arrived.

Akihiko checked the clock.

_5PM. _he thought.

_That leaves me with about two and a half to three hours of time to kill. _

He groaned, his room suddenly feeling small and cramped as a feeling of restlessness overcame him. He didn't think he could stand waiting here patiently one more minute, let alone three hours.

Silently, he wheeled himself over near his bed to the call button for the nurse. He pressed it, and within minutes the nurse had arrived, worriedly asking him if he felt sick or if his head hurt at all.

"No, no. I'm fine." he assured her.

"Are you sure, Usami-san?! I-I don't want you to lie to me. If anything hurts at all, or if you have pain anywhere, please let me know!" she said quickly. The young girl was short and petite, even by Japanese standards, with long inky black hair that was tied back in a ponytail to keep the long strands out of her face as she worked.

Akihiko was the first patient she had been assigned to since she had been hired by the hospital, and she was constantly nervous that she was going to make a mistake in caring for the rich and widely famous man. Akihiko smiled at her in an attempt to ease her worry.

"No, no. I'm fine. I was just going to ask you if I could have permission to go outside." he said. "I was wondering...Kusama-san had told me that the hospital had just planted a new garden, and I was wondering if I could possibly go sit by it and see it for myself."

"Well...I-I don't know, Usami-san...it might not be the best for you…" she said, trailing off with doubt in her tone.

"Oh, but I've been cooped up in here for so long, I just wish that I could get some fresh air." he said, his smooth voice enveloping her like velvet - a trick he used whenever he was forced to speak at award ceremonies he had no interest in.

"Well...I guess it couldn't hurt.." she said, untensing at Akihiko's calming tone. "Kusama-san probably won't mind…"

She looked at the man one last time who, in an effort to win her over, looked at her with pleading eyes.

"...Alright." she said finally.

"Ah, thank you so much!" he said with faked enthusiasm - he was glad to be getting out of his room more than anything else.

The nurse blushed and nodded, quickly wheeling Akihiko out of his room and towards the elevators. Once inside, they chatted about this and that, before the elevator came to a halt on the first floor.

The nurse quietly wheeled Akihiko down the hallway. He received quick glances from everyone they passed, and women would blush and quickly move out of their way. Akihiko smirked to himself.

_I guess I'm still attractive even in this state, huh?_

When they had finally reached the end of the first floor hallway, the moment the nurse had opened the door a cool breeze brushed Akihiko's face.

He inhaled deeply. His ears were filled with the familiar noises of evening Tokyo, and the cool air that had blown over him as they went outside seemed to calm his soul completely. The nurse pushed the wheelchair along the well kept sidewalk until they reached the garden that Nowaki had been talking about - It was close to the hospital, intended for use either by patients wanting to admire the outdoors or patients in their rooms wanting to admire the garden from inside.

She quickly bowed to Akihiko, leaving him in the privacy of the garden and promising to be back to check on him in a few hours or that if Aikawa came, she would tell her where he was. A thought suddenly occurred to him.

"Wait!" he yelled, startling the nurse and causing her to stop.

"Yes?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at him.

"Could...could you possibly bring me back something to write with and some paper?" he asked, causing the nurse's eyes to widen.

"Certainly!" she said, rushing quickly back towards the entrance of the hospital in search of the items that the author had requested.

When she was gone, Akihiko sighed, wheeling himself towards the small bench in the center of the garden. Looking around, he admired many of the flowers and plants that surrounded him - he didn't know the names of any of them, but it didn't make them any less beautiful to look at. Fresh saplings of trees were planted as well, giving the promise of new life and that in a few years they would grow into tall, strong trees.

Akihiko sighed and closed his eyes as another cool breeze blew, causing his slightly overgrown locks to tickle his face and neck. He smiled, breathing deeply as he allowed the fresh air to clear his mind. He began to focus on one thing - his story.

He sat motionless with his eyes still closed and his face relaxing into a blank expression as he allowed his own imagination to swallow him. He thought of the plot - the characters, their names, where they lived, what they were like - he was in complete control and could bend their fates to his own whims.

He imagined their appearances - the first character would be muscular, tan, and have shocking blonde hair and pensive blue eyes. The other character - his "princess" - would be dainty in appearance, with long, silky black hair and gray, sad eyes - eyes that reflected the hurt and suffering they had to endure everyday.

_Suffering...what have they suffered..._he began wondering, developing the back story of his own character.

He began developing their life similar to his own, something relatable that would capture the hearts of his readers - he would have them grow up sad, alone, ignored and hated by their siblings. He would have them be-

"Usami-san! There you are!" the returning nurse had called, shocking Akihiko from his deep thoughts. She quickly strode over to him, handing him a pen and a yellow notepad from her outstretched hand. He took them gladly, and began scribbling his thoughts down in his immaculate handwriting immediately

"...I…I hope it's alright…" the nurse said as she stood awkwardly next to Akihiko, unsure of if she was needed for anything else.

"...hmm." he replied, not particularly paying attention to what she had said, his hand moving quickly across the paper and his eyes concentrated on what he was writing.

The nurse, taking the hint that he wanted to be alone with his work, bowed quietly once more before leaving him in the solitude of the garden again.

Akihiko continued to write as inspiration hit him at full force. He excitedly wrote sentence after sentence, the slowly setting sun acting as a light for him as his thoughts became tangible. He poured all of the emotions and effort he had into his characters as he could, wiping sweat off of his forehead and constantly gripping the pad of papers as the wind blew.

By the time the sun had finally set, he had just added the period on the final sentence of the third chapter of the story, which occupied over forty pages of the notepad. He laughed in accomplishment at the beginning of his new piece, raising it above his head and genuinely smiling for the first time in days.

He yawned, realizing suddenly that the sun had set and night had fallen. He stretched his arms high over his head, causing his hospital gown to rise slightly on his lithe legs as the mischievous wind blew once more.

At this action, he heard a loud _crash _come from what sounded like one of the hospital rooms.

_What the hell? _he thought, looking curiously from window to window for any sign of movement from the rooms - a sudden smirk tugged at his lips as a thought crossed his mind.

_Was someone watching me, perhaps?_

He lazily scanned each row of windows, most of which the lights were either off inside or had the curtains drawn.

Out of the corner of his eye, he thought he saw the curtains in one of the sixth floor rooms move slightly. He stared intently, piercing the window with his gaze waiting for any more movement from it, when he heard a familiar voice calling his name.

"Usami-sensei~!"

He turned to see Aikawa waving enthusiastically at him as she ran in his direction. She was in her usual high heels, and was wearing a long skirt that complimented the fancy blouse she wore.

"Usami-sensei!" she breathed, winded from all the running she had done. He waited for her to catch her breath before she continued.

"When I got to your room, the nurse said that I could find you out here, in the garden." she explained, her eyes freezing on the notepad in his lap where he was sitting in his wheelchair.

"Wait...have you actually started working on something _already?!_" she asked, completely astonished as she took the notepad from her proudly smiling author's hand.

"Yeah. The idea of it just hit me, and I knew it was something you would like, so I just took it upon myself to start right away." he said, smiling at Aikawa as she frantically flipped through each page, reading the story as quickly as possible.

He waited patiently in silence for her to finish. When she had, she looked at him with wide eyes.

"How...how long did it take you to write all of this?!" she asked.

"Well...since you're here, that must mean it's around...eight o'clock? So then about two and a half hours, I guess." he said, pretending as if it were no big deal.

"It's wonderful, Usami-sensei! It really is!" she squealed, hugging the precious new manuscript to her chest.

"Hey hey, don't flatter me. You probably only like it because there's a crossdresser." he laughed.

She sighed and shook her head, knowing that she couldn't argue with him (he was right, after all) and began wheeling him back towards the hospital with a smile on her face. She was relieved to see her author writing again - not just because it was his job, but because it was a great sign that he was getting back to normal.

"Oh, and I have a pair of clothes for you that I brought." she said, wheeling him along the sidewalk.

"I left them in your hospital room. I brought you a black sweater and some jeans since it's getting cooler out, but…"

"But what?" Akihiko asked, curious as to why Aikawa had suddenly trailed off mid sentence.

"Oh, it's nothing. I just could've sworn you had a red scarf at home that I was going to bring, but I couldn't find it anywhere" she sighed as they reentered the building.

"A red scarf, huh…" Akihiko said, not particularly interested in the matter as they moved down the hallway.

They stopped in front of the elevator, and Aikawa pushed the button.

"Oh well," she sighed, looking up at the ceiling. "It's not like it's anything important. It's probably just in your disaster of a room somewhere."

"I'm sure we'll find it eventually."

* * *

Earlier that same day, Takahashi Misaki had become restless as well.

Similarly to Akihiko, Misaki was scheduled to be released later that evening. He couldn't wait to get back home where Manami and Mahiro were waiting for him.

Takahiro had visited him nearly every day, but Manami and Mahiro hadn't gotten the chance to see him during the time that he had been in the hospital. Misaki didn't particularly mind, however, since - in extreme contrast to Akihiko - the last few days had seemed to have flown by for the young man. Today, however, Takahiro had to work, which meant that he wouldn't be able to come get Misaki until the late evening or night time and hadn't been able to visit him today.

The time seemed to tick by painfully slow for Misaki in his brother's absence, since he didn't have anyone he felt like calling, and nothing interesting was on television that he felt like watching. The nurses had suggested he read a book, but Misaki personally hated reading, unless it was manga or a very short article, since those were easy to handle and didn't contain nearly as many words as novels usually did.

Sighing, Misaki sat up to get a better look at the clock.

_Crap. It's only 5:30! _he thought.

_What am I supposed to do until then?!_

He flopped back down onto the soft mattress, grateful that his injured ribs had healed much better in the past few days. He still winced in pain slightly from time to time, but the pain wasn't anywhere near as bad as it had been before.

His bandages had constantly been changed in the last few days as his road rash healed, and most of his wounds were scabbing over. Now that he didn't need them anymore, his bandages had been removed completely, and Misaki disliked the gross sight of his wounds immensely. He hated looking at his chest and torso and seeing his usually soft skin covered in scars and injuries. He felt slightly insecure, though he wasn't sure why.

_It's not like anyone's going to see me naked _he thought.

The thought left an odd feeling in his chest that he couldn't quite place, and he wasn't sure why.

_Grah! Stupid! Why have I been so forgetful lately?! _he thought, grabbing the sides of his head and shaking it.

His head bandages had been removed as well, allowing for his unruly chocolate locks to flow freely. Misaki was glad that he no longer had to worry about accidentally touching the rough gauze when running his fingers through his hair anymore, and that he wouldn't have to go home today with it on either - he didn't want to draw attention to himself when leaving, and certainly didn't want to frighten Manami or Mahiro when he got home.

He brushed his bangs out of his eyes, sighing loudly and feeling antsy.

Bored, he suddenly sat up and swung his legs over the side of his bed. He stood up and wandered aimlessly around the room, picking up random things he found on shelves or glancing at the assortment of charts that hung on the walls.

He briefly ran his hand across his scarf - which he had tucked back away inside his coat sitting on the counter - feeling immediately soothed by it. He wondered momentarily why he would have worn a red scarf with a light brown coat anyways, but then again he had never been a fashion connoisseur himself. He shook his head and wandered over to the large window in his room.

He liked this room, since from it he had a perfect view of the newly planted garden below. He would look out his window from time to time to admire the plants or to watch the patients that sat down happily with their family or friends that had visited them on the benches outside. As he looked at it now, as expected, no one was there - it was the evening, after all, and visiting hours were ending soon.

Misaki was about to turn away from the window when something suddenly caught his eye. A nurse had brought a man in a wheelchair to the garden. Curious, Misaki watched as he called out something to her before she left.

The man, despite his silver hair, did not seem to be older than his late twenties or early thirties. Misaki could see that he had well toned biceps as he wheeled himself towards the bench, his muscles tensing with each motion as his back faced him.

For some reason, Misaki felt entranced by the man's every movement as he watched him, and his breath caught in his throat as he caught the sight of the man's face as he turned around.

His face seemed as if it were chiseled from stone, as it was pale and free of any blemishes or marks - despite a few healing cuts, but they didn't seem to take away from the man's attractive appearance. His face was angular, and his strong jaw seemed to always be lifted slightly, as if the man was proudly lifting his head wherever he may be. His silver hair seemed to glow in the setting sun as it blew lightly in the wind.

The most startling things, Misaki thought, was the man's eyes. They were an oddly light lavender color, and complimented his hair nicely. They added an air of mystery to him - he would surely stand out if he were in a crowd with several other people.

Misaki felt a blush creeping to his face, and suddenly wondered why.

_What am I blushing for?! He's a guy..._he thought, embarrassed by himself.

_What am I doing, so dumb…_

But still, Misaki did not look away. He hid behind his curtain, peeking out slightly to watch the man - he didn't want to be caught, since he'd surely look creepy or stalkerish if the man saw him lurking at the window.

Misaki's breath caught in this throat again when the man smiled softly to himself - he seemed as if he were completely at ease in the small garden as he admired everything from the small flowers blooming in the ground to the small trees whose tiny branches reached for the sky. He looked - Miskai thought - undeniably handsome.

Misaki's chest tightened as his heart began to hammer against his ribs loudly - the man's smile seemed to set something off within him. He grabbed the front of his shirt, confused by his own beating heart.

_So what? _Misaki thought, trying to calm his own heart down.

_So, he's just an extremely attractive person, who just happens to be a guy...this doesn't mean anything...this doesn't, oh…_

Misaki's thoughts slowed as the man suddenly closed his eyes and his face went blank. The man's eyebrows furrowed slightly as the minutes ticked by, and he seemed lost in his own thoughts.

_I wonder what he's thinking about…_

Misaki watched the man as he remained perfectly still for several minutes. Misaki's breathing had slowed as he watched in silent anticipation for when the man would open his eyes again, until he had become nearly as still as the person he was watching.

Misaki was startled when the man's eyes suddenly shot open. His heart immediately raced when he realized the nurse had returned with something in her hands. What she was holding, Misaki realized, was a yellow notepad and a pen as she handed it to the man's eagerly waiting hands.

Misaki watched as the man intently began scribbling down on the notepad as he leaned over to balance it on his lap - his silver bangs hiding his face from view as it hovered only inches away from the paper as he completely ignored the world. The young nurse stood there awkwardly for a few moments, before bowing and leaving again.

_Is he writing a story, perhaps? _Misaki wondered, resting his chin on his palms as he watched the man from above.

_I wonder what he's writing about..._he thought dreamily.

The man had written for nearly three hours, during which at some point Misaki had pulled a chair over to sit down in. He was extremely fascinated in the way the man seemed to tune the entire world out to delve in his own - how he seemed as if he were turning thoughts and theories into words and real things.

Misaki didn't understand why he found this so interesting. He thought, maybe, it was because the man could do something he could not - whereas Misaki couldn't even _read _a book without struggling, this man was writing his own.

He was taking his imagination and turning it into a reality. And to Misaki, now that he thought about it, that was incredible.

Misaki had watched as the man, without fail, wrote word after word, sentence after sentence and page after page. His beautiful movements entranced Misaki as his hand moved gracefully across the page and as his body rocked slightly whenever a good idea hit him.

Whenever the wind blew, Misaki would get a glimpse of the man's face - his eyes were always intent and focused, and his brows were always furrowed in concentration.

And, during all this, Misaki sat there watching, his heart fluttering at each of these man's actions - confusing him to no end as he struggled to understand why he was feeling this way.

_This isn't normal..._he thought.

By the time the sun had finally set, the man suddenly cheered - holding what he had worked on so diligently in his hands as a true smile spread across his face.

Misaki's throat went dry as he grasped the curtain tightly, leaning closer to the window to get a better look.

The man, from what Misaki could see, had a slight pink tint to his cheeks, and his lips were pulled back to reveal a set of perfectly white teeth. His eyes seemed to glow with pride as he looked at the notepad - he seemed honestly, and purely happy.

Blood pounded in Misaki's ears as a fierce blush spread across his face as he licked his dry lips. His skin felt hot as he watched the man as he stretched his long arms above his head, flexing his deliciously evident biceps, making his head go numb and his heart go crazy.

_Closer..._he thought, leaning on the edge of his seat to get a better look at the man.

Suddenly, as if on cue, a convenient gust of wind blew, causing the end if the man's nightgown to rise slightly on his legs, revealing that above his casts, his tightly toned thighs peeked out at Misaki from underneath the flimsy fabric.

At the sight of the man's newly exposed flesh, Misaki's heart squeezed so tightly that he involuntarily spasmed, accidentally knocking over his chair - sending it and himself falling to the floor with a seemingly deafening crash.

Misaki's heart pounded in the painful silence as he pressed his face into the cold tiled floor, praying the man hadn't heard him, though Misaki knew he there was a slim chance that he hadn't.

_What do I do, what do I do?! _Misaki panicked, knowing that he had to get up eventually, when all he really wanted to do was to lie there in embarrassment.

Slowly, Misaki began to rise shakily to his feet, his heart racing and his breathing shallow. He hid behind one of the curtains before cautiously peeking out from behind it. He immediately saw the man scanning the building with a devilish smirk across his face.

_Oh no, he heard me! _Misaki panicked, trembling slightly as his cheeks flamed with embarrassment.

Though, the fact the man was scanning the windows told Misaki that he wasn't entirely sure which room the crash had come from. A small amount of relief filled Misaki as he tried to stand completely still as the man's gaze seemed to come closer to where he was.

Misaki's hand that he was using to hold the curtain trembled slightly, and he used his other hand to try and still it. In this attempt, Misaki had accidentally yanked the curtain down slightly. Cursing, he kept still as he peeked out from under his bangs to see if the man had noticed.

The man's intense gaze was directly on Misaki, causing a slick sweat to form on his back and his legs to weaken, making him tremble slightly.

Misaki knew that since the lights were off in his room, and the fact that he was mostly hidden by the curtain, there was a good chance the man could not see him.

Yet still, those piercing lavender seemed to pierce him where he stood.

_This pressure...I'm going to collapse..._he thought.

Suddenly, just before Misaki's legs were about to give out, the man's head suddenly snapped to the right as something caught his attention. Misaki sank thankfully to his knees, sighing as if the entire weight of the world had been lifted off of his shoulders.

He allowed the cold tile of the floor cool his sweating palms as he took a few deep breaths, before quietly peeking his head over the window sill to see what was going on.

To his surprise, it had been a woman who had gotten the man's attention.

_Who is she?! _Misaki thought as scooted his way closer, grasping the window sill so tightly that his knuckles began to turn white.

The woman was about average height, with long strawberry blond hair and a lovely heart-shaped face. She wore heels, and a blouse was tucked into her long skirt. She was obviously beautiful, Misaki thought, but he wondered why he didn't react to the sight of her in the same way as he had the man beside her.

He watched intently as the man gave her a soft smile as he handed her the notepad. She flipped through it excitedly, saying something to the man as she hugged it to her chest.

Misaki strained to hear what she was saying, but it was no use.

_What's she saying?! _he panicked.

_Wh-why is she so excited? Did he write it for her? Like...a love story?!_

_Are...they together…?_

Misaki's heart sank immediately at the thought as his grip on the window sill lessened.

_They do look good together..._he thought sadly, watching as the woman began wheeling the man away, smiles on both of their faces.

_She looks much better with him than you would _a small voice in the back of his head whispered.

Misaki felt himself becoming depressed. His throat tightened and he felt tears sting his eyes as he watched the two figures disappear from his view.

_Wait, why am I depressed?! _Misaki thought, shaking his head violently.

_What the hell is wrong with me?_

Misaki harshly rubbed his eyes - his brother was sure to show up soon and there was no way he'd want Takahiro to show up and find him crying. Sighing, Misaki picked up the previously strewn chair from off the floor before he flicked on the lamp next to his bed, temporarily blinding him and making his eyes sting more.

Misaki quietly closed the curtains, blocking any view of the garden as he walked back over to his bed and sat. He shakily ran his fingers through his hair as his heart beat slowly and painfully in his chest.

He silently swung his legs up and stretched out on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling above. His arms were outstretched and his palms were facing up.

He closed his eyes, silently waiting for his brother to arrive - the image of the mysterious man's smile burned in the back of his mind.

* * *

About fifteen minutes later, Takahiro arrived, cheerily greeting Misaki who, in return, gave his brother the best smile he could.

Misaki felt terribly depressed, but Takahiro didn't seem to notice. Takahiro informed Misaki that Nowaki had told him that they were allowed to leave whenever they pleased as long as they made sure to check out at the main desk. Misaki was relieved to finally be leaving the hospital, hoping that once he returned home that things in his head would go back to being normal.

Takahiro handed misaki a fresh pair of clothes he had brought from home, and turned away to give Misaki some privacy as he changed. He pulled a green sweater over his head, struggling slightly with his casted arm, but once the sweater was on Misaki relished in the feeling of the soft cotton caressing his skin. It was an entirely different feeling than having the coarse paper of the hospital gown constantly scratching on his newly scabbed over wounds.

He tugged on new jeans that were hole free, and they hugged him snugly on his narrow hips. He slipped on his plain white socks, and forced his feet into his familiar old sneakers, lacing them up quickly and efficiently.

"Okay, Nii-chan." Misaki said, grabbing his old pile of clothes off of the counter.

"I'm ready to go."

"Great! Let's go!" Takahiro replied, turning around to look at his newly clothed sibling.

Takahiro smiled, elated that he would finally be able to take his brother home - Manami was preparing a hot pot as they spoke, and Mahiro couldn't wait to see his Mi-chan again.

Misaki trudged along, smiling faintly at Takahiro who offered to carry his extra clothes, but he politely refused. He held his clothes tightly to his chest - his scarf still tucked safely away inside. He hadn't told Takahiro he had found it, and for some reason a feeling in his gut told him that he shouldn't.

Deciding to listen to himself for once, he pretended as if nothing was different, and walked out into the hall as Takahiro closed the now vacant hospital room behind them. They turned towards the direction of the elevators, Takahiro beginning to chat happily, when he froze mid sentence.

Unsure of why his brother had suddenly stopped, Misaki traced his brother's gaze to where his brother was looking.

Someone at the end of the hallway was leaving their room. Misaki heard the creak of the wheels of a wheelchair.

"Wah, Usami-sensei, as soon as we get home you have to get working on that story as soon as possible!" he heard someone say in a cheery voice that sounded definitely like a woman's.

Misaki twitched, and time seemed to slow as the man from before suddenly appeared, the same beautiful woman in the skirt pushing him out of the doorway and into the hall. She closed the door behind her as the man rested his head in his hand with his eyes closed, and a pair of crutches balanced in his lap. He looked as if he weren't paying attention to her babbling at all.

"I need to know what happens next as soon as…" the woman trailed off as her gaze rested on Misaki and Takahiro. She locked eyes with Takahiro for a few moments and faltered.

_Do they know each other? _Misaki thought, looking between the two as they merely stared at each other, as if they shared a mutual understanding of something that Misaki was unaware of.

"...Aikawa?" the man in the wheelchair spoke, snapping both Takahiro and the woman who, Misaki guessed, was Aikawa.

"Why did you stop talking?" The man in the wheelchair slowly opened his eyes, causing Misaki's heart to begin to flutter as he quickly looked away, making himself busy as he dropped down on one knee and pretended to retie his shoe. Misaki felt the man's gaze upon him and his brother before the woman spoke again.

"Huh? Oh! Uh, no reason, I just, uh, lost my train of thought." she said quickly. Misaki stood back up, watching as the woman began wheeling the man in the direction of the elevators.

"Come on, Misaki." Takahiro ordered quietly, tugging gently on his little brother's sleeve, following the other two down the hallway as they headed towards the same destination.

_Oh, no. _Misaki thought, feeling the familiar heat of a blush cover his face.

_Oh no, we're going to have to ride the elevator together! _Misaki panicked, fighting the urge to run in the opposite direction as he felt his anxiety begin to spike.

_What do I do, what do I do?! I don't know if I can stay calm if we get that close to each other..._

Misaki wished he could disappear as he and Takahiro walked towards what he knew was surely going to be an embarrassing experience on his part, his footsteps on the tiled floor echoing the rhythm of his beating heart.

* * *

**Hello, everybody!**

**Yikes, this chapter is pretty long, isn't it...oh well, I hope you enjoyed it!**

**Anyways...**

**I hope everyone is doing wonderful! (and hopefully your grades/work isn't dropping in quality like mine have been recently...*goes to the shame corner*)**

**-OopsIThoughtICouldFlyy**


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